hi bro, feel your pain
went through the same when my first one was born
i dont have in-laws to help, only my mum. also the first baby in the family, so i guess we were all out of our league coz no experience. i was breastfeeding so my mum also felt that it added to the problem because the baby was very hard to comfort. so it was a super stressful period of our lives..I remember one night husband and i went out on a movie date and 30 mins later she called me asking me what time i will be back and can hear the baby wailing in the background. when my husband went to pick the baby up, my mother was in a dazed stupor and didn't talk to us for the next few days (lol). after that we never left the baby with her at night anymore after that.
anyways it was like that for the first few months or so, every once in a while she will bring up the issue of hiring a maid but we didn't as we didn't want to jaga a maid on top of everything else. it got better as the baby got older. but when i got my second kid, it wasn't even up for negotiation, she made it pretty clear that she would not be caring for No.2. I got a babysitter till No.2 was old enough for childcare. Babysitter was also another adventure...every few months will tell me want to stop taking care, must go and sayang her.
The truth is, our parents are not obliged to care for our kids, lah. sometimes when I sit down and think about it, do I want to spend my 'golden' years caring for my grandkids? but at the same time, your parents also need to have time to adjust to a newborn as well.
It's a very heartpain issue coz it's family, yo. all the best, don't take it (too) personally. See things from their perspective as well.