any parents here? your parents got refuse to take care of your baby/child?

gumbokins

Supremacy Member
Joined
Jan 10, 2011
Messages
6,354
Reaction score
655
It's sad to hear that from someone that we thought we can rely on.

Sent from HUAWEI ALP-L29 using GAGT

honestly speaking
would i stay home to take care of a newborn for 1.6k? no i dont think so lol
 

sunsetbay

Moderator
Moderator
Joined
Jul 3, 2000
Messages
49,996
Reaction score
2,538
no choice~ left only infant care, baby sitter or maid lor~

i notice my neighbour is a full time baby sitter, she took care of 1 to 2 babies at home~ not sure how much she charge~
 

Grampa

Banned
Joined
Oct 8, 2013
Messages
16,951
Reaction score
2
Cannot let elderly take care overnight one. Hire a maid and put at their place together with baby in day time. Night time take back ownself suffer.
 

Bubblebum

Arch-Supremacy Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2012
Messages
17,086
Reaction score
397
no choice~ left only infant care, baby sitter or maid lor~

i notice my neighbour is a full time baby sitter, she took care of 1 to 2 babies at home~ not sure how much she charge~

Those neighbour as full time bb sitter is another option. Maybe TS shd ask ard.
 

Grampa

Banned
Joined
Oct 8, 2013
Messages
16,951
Reaction score
2
Ignore comments whom dont know anything abt parenthood. Dont let affect u.

This is process and opening chapters in life. U are blessed. Bitter first, sweet later

Cheers

Dumbest comment ever. U can guaranteed is confirm sweet later? U don’t read news much don’t u?
 

Titus3

Senior Member
Joined
May 27, 2015
Messages
977
Reaction score
10
Same boat as you. First baby in the family she was very excited and says she will take care since she also has a maid. First 2 months I care for the baby myself. 3rd month she ask me to hire a maid bcos her maid need to take care of her dogs.
 

Sai777

Arch-Supremacy Member
Joined
Apr 3, 2011
Messages
17,060
Reaction score
2
TS jin jiaklat

Parents already take care of him when young, now expect to take care of grand children
 

Leave No Men Behind

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
53,342
Reaction score
35
Infant care, then dun engage helper. For my case now or rather few more years, i might have to keep the helper with change of plan..:) while 1st child enrolling playgroup.

Ifc etc, should be ard 500 with working mum subsidy up to 300dollars. Still manageable.

I am giving my mil and sil 500. Maid including levy at 600 (excluding makan, toiletries etc).
Well, can pull through one lar. Plan properly. Money not an issue. Put the baby cash bonus into good use. Good thing is paid out partial by partial.

What both ur work hours like? Let me try figure out
Had thought abt it but full day infant care costs much more than maid and maid can also do other stuff like clean the house. Also infantcarr need to pick up by certain time and me n Wife both work Long hrs. But maid I worry will mistreat child. If do both hire maid and send child care one mth 2k plus gone. I not so rich. :(
 

Titus3

Senior Member
Joined
May 27, 2015
Messages
977
Reaction score
10
Cannot let elderly take care overnight one. Hire a maid and put at their place together with baby in day time. Night time take back ownself suffer.

I did that after Kena played out by Her. Still cannot wor.. kept calling me at office screaming complaints about the maid. Bcos of that I changed maid 3 times!
 

gnoes85

High Supremacy Member
Joined
Jun 25, 2008
Messages
33,263
Reaction score
4,637
Singapore culture is like that. My atb wife parents feels it's an obligation to take care of their grandchildren. I don't even need to ask them. But if I ask my sinkie parents, I can already forsee 1000 excuses from them.
 

Grampa

Banned
Joined
Oct 8, 2013
Messages
16,951
Reaction score
2
I did that after Kena played out by Her. Still cannot wor.. kept calling me at office screaming complaints about the maid. Bcos of that I changed maid 3 times!

Then it is your parents fault. They promise to take care and u have done the necessary arrangement. Still make noise then they crappy Liao
 

qhong61

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2015
Messages
54,389
Reaction score
7,479
When I initially told my mum I consider infant care 1.6k she said she will take care instead n ask me pay her that. Now she chut stunt say no ability take care of baby. Sigh :(
Are you willing to pay her $1.6k if she is willing to look after?
 

Sodomicha

Arch-Supremacy Member
Joined
Aug 7, 2013
Messages
14,138
Reaction score
2,746
Young couples take care of infant/toddler also hei hei chuan.Let alone our ageing parents.If parents bo xin to take care also cannot blame them.Those experienced home based nanny is another option.If u want to hire maid,you got to install cctv in the house.
 

Leave No Men Behind

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
53,342
Reaction score
35
Helper is not an option unless for household chores etc. Kio tao kio buay that kind.

In ts case, this option is out.
Ideally is ifc only. Must be prepared for sick etc. Chumxiong with employer on working hours. Am sure most understand/got family.
 

Phumba

Member
Joined
Jul 30, 2016
Messages
271
Reaction score
0
First of all, as a disclaimer, both my parents and in law are either too old or too with their own lives to look after a kid for even 8 hrs aday.

That said. Sounds like u had a kid on the grounds of what ur parents said.
I wld advise u not to. Its ur life, your family and your child. Your name is on his/her birth cert. Grandparents are there to play, tickle and enjoy their company.

So decide on whats best for your child, your family, your life. Sure its hard.... no one said anythibg in life is easy, but dont give away your right as a parent on the premise of someone else promisig you that they can make it easier on you.

Yeah. Now running, chasing for a miad, training....OmG Omg... i know. I been there and still there. Option is infant care. A compromise perhaps... but what in life is not?

On the flip side... be glad that grand parents dont get involved in your kids upbringing. Dont get me wrong.. but bringing up a kid.... grandparents do a **** job.... parents shld do this role.
Geandparents are there to play, and enjoy them.

Thats my stand. Hope u take it in theright way.

Take it easy dad.... its a never ending iteration of decisions and re-decisions... compromises and commitments.
 

qhong61

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Nov 3, 2015
Messages
54,389
Reaction score
7,479
First of all, as a disclaimer, both my parents and in law are either too old or too with their own lives to look after a kid for even 8 hrs aday.

That said. Sounds like u had a kid on the grounds of what ur parents said.
I wld advise u not to. Its ur life, your family and your child. Your name is on his/her birth cert. Grandparents are there to play, tickle and enjoy their company.

So decide on whats best for your child, your family, your life. Sure its hard.... no one said anythibg in life is easy, but dont give away your right as a parent on the premise of someone else promisig you that they can make it easier on you.

Yeah. Now running, chasing for a miad, training....OmG Omg... i know. I been there and still there. Option is infant care. A compromise perhaps... but what in life is not?

On the flip side... be glad that grand parents dont get involved in your kids upbringing. Dont get me wrong.. but bringing up a kid.... grandparents do a **** job.... parents shld do this role.
Geandparents are there to play, and enjoy them.

Thats my stand. Hope u take it in theright way.

Take it easy dad.... its a never ending iteration of decisions and re-decisions... compromises and commitments.
Agreed.....
 

和兴盛嚣张哥

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 11, 2017
Messages
1,540
Reaction score
0
while my wife was pregnant, my parents who were wishing for a grandchild all the while said they were willing to take care of the baby. I said ok, thinking that grandparents look after baby is better than a maid.

fast forward, baby is now nearly 3 months old. baby has been taken care of by confinement lady in first month. and second month by my wife, while my parents came at times in the day to play with him.

then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby. When I was back, my parents say they cannot look after him. He said he cries every few hours for milk and the crying at night was especially difficult. I mean that's what babies do. Anyone can play with the baby, but to change his diapers, rock him to sleep, and feed him is different issue.

so end up now, they told me to go hire a maid when my wife go back work, and they will just pop by at times to check how it goes.

I have mixed feelings about this. if I knew at the start that they are not going to take care of him, I would have hired a maid, but now I am scrambling to find one before my wife go back to work. also, my parents are not doing anything, not working, just staying at home watch tv, or go market or go out. they are free to live their lives that way, but somehow I just feel abit disappointed and abit jealous that some friends of mine have their parents looking after their children for them.

anyone here also like that? :(

Know how to enjoy and fk till song song. Dunno how to take care of own child. Not happy go throw him away la
 

coyote

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Sep 20, 2000
Messages
55,083
Reaction score
13,052
while my wife was pregnant, my parents who were wishing for a grandchild all the while said they were willing to take care of the baby. I said ok, thinking that grandparents look after baby is better than a maid.

fast forward, baby is now nearly 3 months old. baby has been taken care of by confinement lady in first month. and second month by my wife, while my parents came at times in the day to play with him.

then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby. When I was back, my parents say they cannot look after him. He said he cries every few hours for milk and the crying at night was especially difficult. I mean that's what babies do. Anyone can play with the baby, but to change his diapers, rock him to sleep, and feed him is different issue.

so end up now, they told me to go hire a maid when my wife go back work, and they will just pop by at times to check how it goes.

I have mixed feelings about this. if I knew at the start that they are not going to take care of him, I would have hired a maid, but now I am scrambling to find one before my wife go back to work. also, my parents are not doing anything, not working, just staying at home watch tv, or go market or go out. they are free to live their lives that way, but somehow I just feel abit disappointed and abit jealous that some friends of mine have their parents looking after their children for them.

anyone here also like that? :(

Every family is different. Thankfully, my in laws are happily helping to care for my child... Can feel for your problem. When mine was 2 months old, that's the toughest time and thankfully we are through that thanks to my in law.

But if you think about it, those mid night feeding, evening crankiness are really not something everyone can take, even maids. Only the love of parents or grandparents can overcome the stresses brought by new borns. So, if your parents felt it's too much for them, too bad for you. Quickly look for a maid.
 

Buzy_bee

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 28, 2017
Messages
1,311
Reaction score
183
Maybe hire a maid to help out your parents in taking care of baby during daytime. Seems they are not young at 60+. At least they can help to monitor the maid to not do funny things.

We sleep with our baby at night. Very Tiring as both parents have work the next day. Just keep in mind that this phase too shall pass. The nights are long but the years are short. It would get better when your boy gets older and sleep in longer intervals. Jiayou!
 

Sultana

High Supremacy Member
Joined
Oct 27, 2016
Messages
29,468
Reaction score
6,307
Parents oredi how old liao still need to take care of chiur baby. Chiur how old liao can't take care of own kid. Even they offer we iso must 自动abit. Quickly relief the burden bcos ish urs to start wif..some more go holiday. Prolly TL chiur so thoughtless, forgot baby ish u make one, so turn decision in case chiur dump baby & take off again. Hv baby ish no holiday, chiur realli ish too much liao :(
 
Important Forum Advisory Note
This forum is moderated by volunteer moderators who will react only to members' feedback on posts. Moderators are not employees or representatives of HWZ. Forum members and moderators are responsible for their own posts.

Please refer to our Community Guidelines and Standards, Terms of Service and Member T&Cs for more information.
Top