any parents here? your parents got refuse to take care of your baby/child?

Igene

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Tell your parent you're gonna give away their grandchild.

:o

Although I prefer taking care myself but if they promised, make sure they can keep to it.
 

pewpewpew

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Tell your parent you're gonna give away their grandchild.

:o

Although I prefer taking care myself but if they promised, make sure they can keep to it.

Hope next time your own children treat you like that :)
 

TheITGuy

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My story is both sides fighting to take care of my son...

My wife always let her mum aka 外婆 take care whereas my mum aka 阿嬤 only see her grandson once every month and she is very sad...

My wife hate my mum, every thing my mum said or do, she buay song but everything her mum do is ok...

Really is FML...

Same here lol...I'm thinking of walking out of it.
 

n2btg

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"then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby."

If I were your parents I will dump your baby in the bin! :s22:
 

Nevereatrice

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U should have expected this to happen ma u take them for granted then blame them. Give birth or not is your personal decision parents ask u to shoot insai?
 

Ruriel

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TS mentioned not rich enough for both maid and infantcare. Need maid coz need to go fetch baby from infantcare at a timing.

You know what? Having baby is a responsibility. Yes work is also a responsibility but which responsibility is more important? In the first place you should have think it through whether if you have the capability to take care of a new life. That means giving up stuff - giving up going for holidays till years later. Giving up alone time between you and your waifu. You cannot assume parents will take care of your baby even if they have promised so. They have zero obligations to do that you know? Any plans you made should take into account "what if they don't want to help take care then what's plan B?".

Since baby already come out, there's no use saying why you never think about all these before you shoot, etc. You just have to prioritise. Baby more important or work more important? Either you or your wife (either one) have to tell your supervisor or boss that you will need to leave at a certain timing to fetch baby from infantcare. Lots of my colleagues are doing this because they really have to be there to get the baby before 7pm or else will tio fined. My bosses are generally empathetic and will agree one. Just reach office earlier to clear work if possible.

I personally don't trust maids (there are nice maids around but I've personally seen too many bad ones). But if that's your choice then install cctv at home.

Good luck.
 

buffybuffy

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If he goes to parenting forum might have better suggestion than getting bash here . Lol

Parenting forum mostly all in the same sh!t. So can feel one another n easier to agree with each other. EDMW no such sh!t so will give comment on a more nuetral basis.

Anyway, TS got time go short trip means they are too self center Liao. Only think of themselves and totally forgotten his own parents. You mean you don’t know your parents, who brought you up well enough to know if they can really help you?! Do you really know your wife well that she’s willing to let you shoot inside and take up the responsibility as a mother?! I doubt. Short trip?! Pui. Continue to enjoy yourself. Your baby will auto grow up one.
 

Acetone

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They probably forgot how tough it is to look after a baby... anyway, it’s not their fault or responsibility to look after ur kid.

while my wife was pregnant, my parents who were wishing for a grandchild all the while said they were willing to take care of the baby. I said ok, thinking that grandparents look after baby is better than a maid.

fast forward, baby is now nearly 3 months old. baby has been taken care of by confinement lady in first month. and second month by my wife, while my parents came at times in the day to play with him.

then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby. When I was back, my parents say they cannot look after him. He said he cries every few hours for milk and the crying at night was especially difficult. I mean that's what babies do. Anyone can play with the baby, but to change his diapers, rock him to sleep, and feed him is different issue.

so end up now, they told me to go hire a maid when my wife go back work, and they will just pop by at times to check how it goes.

I have mixed feelings about this. if I knew at the start that they are not going to take care of him, I would have hired a maid, but now I am scrambling to find one before my wife go back to work. also, my parents are not doing anything, not working, just staying at home watch tv, or go market or go out. they are free to live their lives that way, but somehow I just feel abit disappointed and abit jealous that some friends of mine have their parents looking after their children for them.

anyone here also like that? :(
 

我的滑板鞋2016

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My story is both sides fighting to take care of my son...

My wife always let her mum aka 外婆 take care whereas my mum aka 阿嬤 only see her grandson once every month and she is very sad...

My wife hate my mum, every thing my mum said or do, she buay song but everything her mum do is ok...

Really is FML...

One mountain cannot have 2 tigeress. The tigeress will fight.
 

GBC

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If cannot handle, just give it up for adoption..
 

Puffysock

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while my wife was pregnant, my parents who were wishing for a grandchild all the while said they were willing to take care of the baby. I said ok, thinking that grandparents look after baby is better than a maid.

fast forward, baby is now nearly 3 months old. baby has been taken care of by confinement lady in first month. and second month by my wife, while my parents came at times in the day to play with him.

then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby. When I was back, my parents say they cannot look after him. He said he cries every few hours for milk and the crying at night was especially difficult. I mean that's what babies do. Anyone can play with the baby, but to change his diapers, rock him to sleep, and feed him is different issue.

so end up now, they told me to go hire a maid when my wife go back work, and they will just pop by at times to check how it goes.

I have mixed feelings about this. if I knew at the start that they are not going to take care of him, I would have hired a maid, but now I am scrambling to find one before my wife go back to work. also, my parents are not doing anything, not working, just staying at home watch tv, or go market or go out. they are free to live their lives that way, but somehow I just feel abit disappointed and abit jealous that some friends of mine have their parents looking after their children for them.

anyone here also like that? :(

The Govt should take care of it, they are the biggest benefactors in terms of tax income when your children grows up.

As for u, thanks for contributing to their million dollar pay and if you cannot retire, there is an option to redeem parts of your hdb lease to Ensure you cannot pass down anything to your kids so that they will slave away to support the ministers pay....:)

Not much benefits and future for you and your family with the PaP around... only broken down mrt to look forward to and exorbitant taxes like absd, ssd and increased gst
 

Brandie

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Hi ts , I am a silent reader for years and decided to create an account to share with you my mothering journey for the past 5 years. I have NO HELP from my in-laws and also from my own parents. My in-laws were too old and gets tired really easily so we can’t force them. My mom, although capable to look after an infant , refused to look after my baby saying it’s too tough for her and she will not have the freedom to go out as and when she wants with a baby. I placed my baby in an infant care then but she will fall sick EVERY week. And I gotto take at least 3 days of urgent leave to look after her every 2 weeks. Needless to say, my job suffered. I decided to quite my job to look after my baby because , to sacrifice my baby or myself- the answer is very clear. I adjusted my lifestyle because our family became single income. Even till now , I hardly go out with my friends because our parents were unable to babysit our daughter and I must be real to toy, there were also times when I envied my friends having help from parents and seem to have so much freedom. But you know what , my Daughter is very very attached to me as a result of me unable to outsource the babysitting. So I feel my sacrifices were worthwhile, this phase is only TEMPORARY. I will have my freedom back when she goes to secondary school and prefers to hang out with her friends haha. Children are a gift and not a burden and I hope your wife and you are able to work Sth out

Oh on a side note , maybe it’s a blessing in disguise that your parents aren’t able to help with your baby. Your wife’s methods and your mom’s methods would differ and you will be stuck in the middle so often with their difference in bringing up the baby
 

Meemoosaa

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.... That means giving up stuff - giving up going for holidays till years later. Giving up alone time between you and your waifu. You cannot assume parents will take care of your baby even if they have promised so. They have zero obligations to do that you know? Any plans you made should take into account "what if they don't want to help take care then what's plan B?".

.....

I think most couples take it for granted that parents are obliged to help and when the parents decided otherwise, they are lost and bitter.

TS needs to take into the psychological effect it has on his parents taking care of the kid while he and the wife goes on a holiday.

There was once my sibling and I decided to take parents out for dinner at a nice restaurant together with the nieces and nephews. They didn't want to go and preferred to stay in, so we thought to leave the kids at home having them to take care of the kids so that my siblings and I can catch up in peace. The parents suddenly decided that they want in for the dinner and openly admitted that they don't feel good psychologically having us going out to have a good time and then leave the kids behind to them. :s13:

It was almost "too cute" and they are only human.

TS - when was the last time you took your parents out or took them on a holiday ?
 

dgeralds

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Your baby you take care. If your parents help it is a bonus.

I know of a case where the baby died due to accident while under the care of grand parents......yes grand parents are old and things can go wrong...

while my wife was pregnant, my parents who were wishing for a grandchild all the while said they were willing to take care of the baby. I said ok, thinking that grandparents look after baby is better than a maid.

fast forward, baby is now nearly 3 months old. baby has been taken care of by confinement lady in first month. and second month by my wife, while my parents came at times in the day to play with him.

then this week, my wife and I took 2 days break to go for a short trip nearby. When I was back, my parents say they cannot look after him. He said he cries every few hours for milk and the crying at night was especially difficult. I mean that's what babies do. Anyone can play with the baby, but to change his diapers, rock him to sleep, and feed him is different issue.

so end up now, they told me to go hire a maid when my wife go back work, and they will just pop by at times to check how it goes.

I have mixed feelings about this. if I knew at the start that they are not going to take care of him, I would have hired a maid, but now I am scrambling to find one before my wife go back to work. also, my parents are not doing anything, not working, just staying at home watch tv, or go market or go out. they are free to live their lives that way, but somehow I just feel abit disappointed and abit jealous that some friends of mine have their parents looking after their children for them.

anyone here also like that? :(
 
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