Stop working at 34yo & live off parents since then, what would you do as a parent?

TheIncredible

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Healthy, no disability, no mental issue. Refuse to work for 5yrs & counting on. What would you do as a parent after countless arguments on the need to be self sufficient? Would you leave him as he is but leave more money to this child for fear of bleak future? Would you ask your other children to support this 34yo when you die? Or would you force him to work by all means?
 

qhong61

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Healthy, no disability, no mental issue. Refuse to work for 5yrs & counting on. What would you do as a parent after countless arguments on the need to be self sufficient? Would you leave him as he is but leave more money to this child for fear of bleak future? Would you ask your other children to support this 34yo when you die? Or would you force him to work by all means?
Help him find a job.
 

Taloona

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Amazing how did he end up like this? Parents must have over indulged him.

Just stop giving him his allowance. And stop cleaning up after him at home.
 

apeape

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what was his excuse for not working since you say countless arguments?

He is already going through a bleak future, by providing for him may worsen the situation.
 

TheIncredible

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No allowance is given. But is surviving well by having 3 meals at home daily, stay at home most of the times and only occassional meet up with friends so not much expense. Said will work, but not now. But this ‘not now’ is extending day by day. Really dont know what to do with this child.
 

qhong61

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No allowance is given. But is surviving well by having 3 meals at home daily, stay at home most of the times and only occassional meet up with friends so not much expense. Said will work, but not now. But this ‘not now’ is extending day by day. Really dont know what to do with this child.
How is he going to survive when u and ur hubby no longer around?
 

foxer77

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if my dad already been chase out of the house.

leaching off .. can anyhow find a part time job.

being a parents

can have a talk to him see what the reasons behind it..

worse case disown him chase him out of the house.
 

TheIncredible

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Suggested see counsellor last time but was scolded i need one instead. Cannot drag to clinic right? If we leave the flat to him only, so he has a roof when we are gone, it means our other children dont get any. Do you think it is fair?
 

alamakazim

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those japanese got such problem right?

otaku stay at home whole day leeching

*write a letter, tell him/her... u will not leave anything behind after death*

write a WILL... scare the sh!t out him/her
 
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qhong61

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Suggested see counsellor last time but was scolded i need one instead. Cannot drag to clinic right? If we leave the flat to him only, so he has a roof when we are gone, it means our other children dont get any. Do you think it is fair?
It is not fair. But is there a choice?
 

Henryspeakyourmind

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His main problem is total denial of his life. He needs psychology help. 5yrs is a long time and getting him to see a shrink will not be easy. He might be suffering from some form of depression, like you said. 29yrs before he was fine. Something has happen to him. Could be love, a setback In life, an insult , etc.

He needs to talk to someone. Unwrap the tangle in his heart.



Healthy, no disability, no mental issue. Refuse to work for 5yrs & counting on. What would you do as a parent after countless arguments on the need to be self sufficient? Would you leave him as he is but leave more money to this child for fear of bleak future? Would you ask your other children to support this 34yo when you die? Or would you force him to work by all means?
 

TheIncredible

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No parents will say own child useless. But he gives me many sleepless nights.

He doesnt seem to have depression. He talks confidently. His appetite is good and only eats healthy food. Dish that he likes he can eat more than half plate by himself. He sleeps 10hrs. He follows his planned timetabke to do every of his home activity. He quit job because Cannot get along with boss.. Hesaid his things planned & dont want us to bother. Nobody at home can comvince him to work.
 

jeffrey745

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Think nowadays ive been hearing many of such cases, in many families there wld sure b 1 family member who's behaviour is like this. Most probably 1 of the parent over-indulged him/her. Seems like its more common in guys than ladies(I've seen at least 3-4 of such ppl, all guys).

He needs to come to his own self-realization....
 

qhong61

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No parents will say own child useless. But he gives me many sleepless nights.

He doesnt seem to have depression. He talks confidently. His appetite is good and only eats healthy food. Dish that he likes he can eat more than half plate by himself. He sleeps 10hrs. He follows his planned timetabke to do every of his home activity. He quit job because Cannot get along with boss.. Hesaid his things planned & dont want us to bother. Nobody at home can comvince him to work.
U still give him pocket money?
 

TheIncredible

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Think nowadays ive been hearing many of such cases, in many families there wld sure b 1 family member who's behaviour is like this. Most probably 1 of the parent over-indulged him/her. Seems like its more common in guys than ladies(I've seen at least 3-4 of such ppl, all guys).

He needs to come to his own self-realization....

Are they still not working for how many years? Mental ok?
 

lasnoblur

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Healthy, no disability, no mental issue. Refuse to work for 5yrs & counting on. What would you do as a parent after countless arguments on the need to be self sufficient? Would you leave him as he is but leave more money to this child for fear of bleak future? Would you ask your other children to support this 34yo when you die? Or would you force him to work by all means?

maybe he has sufficient side business (passive income) running without your knowledge?
 
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