Are we just delusional and kidding ourselves?

[Lolile]

I do try to test test ask around people who are just married and have kids. They all seems so happy and no worries one. Which puzzles me like finances really seems like not an issues with them. So I'm thinking are they that rich or am I that poor?

Despite having kids, quality of life don't drop. And will say is not expensive a lot gov subsidy. Or will say is normal to have kids ma.

I honestly think having kids very expensive. And a normal dual income won't be able to live comfortably. I know some both not working yet still can continue have a high life but I'm just curious ASK and ASB really can don't do anything and money can keep flow in meh?

Dual income therefore combined will be better than single income. However parental responsibilities will be much higher . Need lots of energy & time to care for kids - this is more siong than the financial aspect.
In SG , housing is the main big ticket item. Food etc are affordable if you are not fussy.

those friends u have likely very easy going type. I’ve seen kids every weekend their schedule fully packed - easily $2k per month for their enrichment classes

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

Chiu think this now but 20 year will change view ...

Loneliness gets to every 1 ...

Chiu dont feel it now because yang ...

Once old chiur world view will change ...

Unless chiu on spectrum

Nah I'm quite sure I rather deal with loneliness than nonsense from people. Maybe this statement work for others but probably not me since I already seen the dark side of life involving people for many years liao.

 

[orpisia]

Every night I go to sleep wishing it was the last...but it never came true.

Actually for those who suffer greatly in life, death come for them is better

More kind if death comes and take them away

 

[kimsix]

I see edmw always jjww that single is the way, alone got more money and freedom etc.

But I see reality (maybe on surface) is that those who are successful at work are also the ones got lucky to bto within 1 or 2 tries, marry early, have kids and have a typical happy family life. Every year holiday with life progressing well.

Early 20s somehow did ok at work, mid 20s marry, late 20s have kids. By early 30 have house, have car, have wife, have kids and helpers le.

Is us behkan bbfa keep jjww say FIRE is best but truth is we just unwanted and behkan. (Besides some troll here but reality are hidden dragons)

Go dating kena hiam, bbfa like us can't score dates or just kena ghosted. Forever stuck in low ses loop worry about next day.

While the reality outside people all celebrating next milestones and trying to achieve next goal. Only we here being echo chamers trying to affirm each others misery nia. Correct ma?

Yes is half truth.

best is DINK earning >$11,000 household income per month. pap gave them best of both worlds

rest are all behkan or work zombies.

better get a dink husband fast! chiobu also cannot stay chio after 35.

 

[congster2]

Truth is when find this kind end up will become entitled and believe that the wife can continue 吃苦 and suffer more with no guilt.

That's not necessarily true.
My then-gf now wife was willing to go through hardship with me. She used to sit with me behind my dad's pick-up (unsheltered) in the old days. She stayed by my side when I had to go through a difficult medical situation before we were even married.
We are fairly well off now, and we have 2 kids.
Real couples don't 斤斤计较.

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

That's not necessarily true.
My then-gf now wife was willing to go through hardship with me. She used to sit with me behind my dad's pick-up (unsheltered) in the old days. She stayed by my side when I had to go through a difficult medical situation before we were even married.
We are fairly well off now, and we have 2 kids.
Real couples don't 斤斤计较.

Good that you got 良心 and treat her well. Not everyone has.

 

[pokipoki08]

世上有些话是没办法说到清清楚楚。
There are some things in this world that cannot be expressed clearly, no matter how one tries.

人生不如意之事十有八之九
万般皆是命
半点不由人
Eight or nine out of ten things in life are not what you want, unable to attain.

 

[congster2]

Good that you got 良心 and treat her well. Not everyone has.

it's teamwork. So if you are looking for a partner, look for someone who doesn't 斤斤计较 and adopt the same attitude. Looks, their financials now doesn't matter. But life habits do matter. Good to look for someone more stingy. It just means the person is careful with money and won't 挥霍.

You were making a point about financials. The reality is quite simple - both work hard, upgrade skills, keep improving. Not just me, not just my wife. Spend below our means and accumulate enough $ so that that $ can actually make a difference, be it in investment capital, downpayment etc. I could have bought a car easily 2 decades ago. I didn't. Maybe pp look down on me. They had no idea. I only bought one 2.5 years ago, and I bought a cheap second hand car. We don't dine at expensive restaurants. Our combined assets are easily 3m. Put money in appreciating assets. Minimise putting into depreciating assets. How difficult is that?

In case that question comes, my salary started at about 3k. My wife probably 2.5k. That was 20 years ago.

 

[arsenalfc85]

Yes, with enough money all your shortcomings also can make do one.


I beg to differ, nowadays guys not only want chio, they want you to have good family background, nice personality (aka be meek and submissive), earn well and smart.

Unless super chio and marry a rich man. If not normal man first thing is ask how much you earn to make sure you can self sustain and copay a bto or best EC and secure a higher loan amount or pay off faster.

i still think sg guys more jialat

need money la

yes, got money doesn't mean sure happy or can get gf

but at least got money stand higher chance to get gf,
got money at least i can travel more, go different places to jiak ho liao
can hire 2 maids so i no need to settle so much stuff, n will have more time to go out n meet ppl

now i no money no charbor want, no money to go out n try out different experiences end up im just a boring dude, no time to go out also cuz need to settle stuff at home n need to find ways to make more money.

i don't buy into simi guys can get gf with strong personality etc. all bs

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

it's teamwork. So if you are looking for a partner, look for someone who doesn't 斤斤计较 and adopt the same attitude. Looks, their financials now doesn't matter. But life habits do matter. Good to look for someone more stingy. It just means the person is careful with money and won't 挥霍.

You were making a point about financials. The reality is quite simple - both work hard, upgrade skills, keep improving. Not just me, not just my wife. Spend below our means and accumulate enough $ so that that $ can actually make a difference, be it in investment capital, downpayment etc. I could have bought a car easily 2 decades ago. I didn't. Maybe pp look down on me. They had no idea. I only bought one 2.5 years ago, and I bought a cheap second hand car. We don't dine at expensive restaurants. Our combined assets are easily 3m. Put money in appreciating assets. Minimise putting into depreciating assets. How difficult is that?

In case that question comes, my salary started at about 3k. My wife probably 2.5k. That was 20 years ago.

20 years ago 3k is quite a lot. Nowadays many people are still making 3k. But things are so damn expensive and we probably don't have the same opportunities when comes to property liao.

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

i still think sg guys more jialat

need money la

yes, got money doesn't mean sure happy or can get gf

but at least got money stand higher chance to get gf,
got money at least i can travel more, go different places to jiak ho liao
can hire 2 maids so i no need to settle so much stuff, n will have more time to go out n meet ppl

now i no money no charbor want, no money to go out n try out different experiences end up im just a boring dude, no time to go out also cuz need to settle stuff at home n need to find ways to make more money.

i don't buy into simi guys can get gf with strong personality etc. all bs

Yes for now I think you focus making more money first. You still have a dementia dad you need to care for. If now get into rs only extra burden.

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

Yes is half truth.

best is DINK earning >$11,000 household income per month. pap gave them best of both worlds

rest are all behkan or work zombies.

better get a dink husband fast! chiobu also cannot stay chio after 35.

DINK is great. Both enjoy martial benefits while can still live like single too.

 

[1982-1994]

Chiu are not bbfa, and one that post nicely. So you don't believe the delusional and echo chambers.

Used to be bbfa as you can see from the pic, upgraded to bb now ,waist 38"

Is always heartwarming to see your post, you are the rare few here that are genuine and down to earth.

Thank you for your support
More like I choose to be ignorant about the reality, chup siao the two women's of my life and mine but others
Like, I don't even know what does "woke" means,
why do most people support Donald Trump
And don't know why the role example of income here is $20k/mth, don't know how did edmwers derive the figure

 

[kreja]

Don't have right answer. Life is short. Don't expect too much and just be contented with what is given.

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

Dual income therefore combined will be better than single income. However parental responsibilities will be much higher . Need lots of energy & time to care for kids - this is more siong than the financial aspect.
In SG , housing is the main big ticket item. Food etc are affordable if you are not fussy.

those friends u have likely very easy going type. I’ve seen kids every weekend their schedule fully packed - easily $2k per month for their enrichment classes

I think some really doing quite well got 2 helper, 1 for each kid leh. While some purposely buy conti car just to prepare the baby arrival and admit in private A ward which 2 nights alr $18k. And some despite have kids still can keep get new branded.

So they are definitely not the simple type. But seems like just normal working class. So I'm curious money comes from where lol.

 

[Lolile]

I think some really doing quite well got 2 helper, 1 for each kid leh. While some purposely buy conti car just to prepare the baby arrival and admit in private A ward which 2 nights alr $18k. And some despite have kids still can keep get new branded.

So they are definitely not the simple type. But seems like just normal working class. So I'm curious money comes from where lol.

Couple both around 30s? Possible cos if both in their 30s, pay shd be around $7- $8k , combined $14- 16k?

Recent report says sg median household income abt $11k + so not surprising

 

[huphoe]

Yah single BBFA , less worriess

 

[neutralph]

I have always say Singapore economy is very good. I run my own accounting firm, and know hundreds of SME bosses. If economy is bad, I will among the first to know because I do their accounts and audit and tax.

So far Singapore is quite huat

Didn't know just by basing on a few hundreds out of the 200k+ SMEs can determine the country economy. Your business must be damn huat.

 

[congster2]

20 years ago 3k is quite a lot. Nowadays many people are still making 3k. But things are so damn expensive and we probably don't have the same opportunities when comes to property liao.

3k is the basic starting salary for fresh engineering graduates. I was an engineering grad. It's now 4.5k.

https://www.reddit.com/r/singapore/s/MjMrbv0upT

Anyway yes, the field is tilted in favour of couples, but the formula hasn't changed. Young couples, get a bto, exit when ready (i exited after 15 years), use the capital gains plus a bit for downpayment of next property. It's still doable.

 

[chuakboon]

Heng i jobless