Worth to have kids anot?

BigToteBag

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In 30s, considering. I see my friends all like no sleep, no life. Parents, what makes it worth it? Any money/life stage things to take note
 

BrOwnTeddy

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Nothing is worth considering if you'd use straight numbers.
 

fire

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Just asked your parents, you will get the answer you seek.
 

habeeb

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In 30s, considering. I see my friends all like no sleep, no life. Parents, what makes it worth it? Any money/life stage things to take note

I'm not sure if hwz is the best channel to ask this question, you will probably get troll answers.

I can try to answer it as a young parent (32) of a 4 yr old. The kids usually grow up themselves. I find the whole process of parenting a phase of self discovery. Your finances may be tested (most of them place overemphasis on money but it is not). Your patience will surely be tested. Your freedom to do the things you have done and want to do will be tested. Relationship with your wife will be tested. What I feel is that, many use finances as an excuse to be ready to have kids (ready in the sense, you have sufficient money to throw on things like maid, nanny, infantcare, childcare to continue doing the things you used to do while not sacrificing your own efforts in raising the kid) OR not have a kid as you are not prepared to give up life's pleasures and freedom that you have always enjoyed.

You may hear a lot of comments on how priceless/joyous the time spent with the child is. That is really subjective as it depends on whether you are a person who can appreciate those things. It also raises the question on whether SHOULD you appreciate those things in the sense are you "supposed to". In a seemingly free world of choice, it is really up to you to take the leap and put yourself up to the challenge of raising a child at the cost of your entire existence. Although it isn't wrong, I feel that not having a kid is the easy and cowardly choice.
 

ksapple

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In 30s, considering. I see my friends all like no sleep, no life. Parents, what makes it worth it? Any money/life stage things to take note

i dunno worth or not worth, i can only tell u when u wan to have u is really damn farking hard to get
 

yukita

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when you calculate in $ definitely not worth it. if you adding on the time and effort, its just even worse and it does not make any sense to have kids. but then, there is something else that make it worth when you see your kids smile, laughing and growing up, something that even money will not be able to buy (and all this partly due to the suffering only then you can enjoy the joy).
 

mickey88

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life experience..ppl with kids will tok abt tis n abt tat..but those without kids will nv understand
 

8zaoyu

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Ask those who are born with mental & physical disabilties and cannot sustain themselves, those who had multiple miscarriages, those who gave birth to one only that nearly cost her life off - why still want kids?
I can only say if you are uncomfortable or un-shareable to give family love, do not give birth. Just work,sing,cook, travel and do whatever you want forever, just be happy. Other folks will just be happy for what you are as long as you do not harm others. I have many single colleagues and ex-classmates, siblings who are enjoying life whole-heartedly
 

INTP Guy

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when you calculate in $ definitely not worth it. if you adding on the time and effort, its just even worse and it does not make any sense to have kids. but then, there is something else that make it worth when you see your kids smile, laughing and growing up, something that even money will not be able to buy (and all this partly due to the suffering only then you can enjoy the joy).
yeah agree with Yukita but also depends on individuals. Some ppl prefer to live without kids as they find the "sacrifices" too much for these joys
 

eD|t|0n

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life experience..ppl with kids will tok abt tis n abt tat..but those without kids will nv understand
Why would ppl with no kids want to understand ppl with kids - those joy points and pain points...there is no need for either side of the boat to understand
 

eD|t|0n

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Ask those who are born with mental & physical disabilties and cannot sustain themselves, those who had multiple miscarriages, those who gave birth to one only that nearly cost her life off - why still want kids?
I can only say if you are uncomfortable or un-shareable to give family love, do not give birth. Just work,sing,cook, travel and do whatever you want forever, just be happy. Other folks will just be happy for what you are as long as you do not harm others. I have many single colleagues and ex-classmates, siblings who are enjoying life whole-heartedly
True to this!! Everyone have their own life to live out....if you think having kids is not your cup of tea...then don’t do it...most importantly, you and your partner have the same outlook and direction in life.
 

amransan

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I always tell those who are close to me before they want or plan to have baby in Singapore they must do their math properly.

because having baby or babies in Singapore is not cheap it is very expensive the more they grow the more u need to use a lot of money.

if u are low income husband and with take home combined $2300 better think 1000X

if both take home pay is $4000 then can have one baby.

don’t be pressured by others always ask u when u want to have baby because at the end of the day it’s u are the one who take care of the baby.

sorry I seen many families break apart because not enough money because they have extra mouth to feed and at the end of the day the child is the one who suffer the most when parent divorce.
 

8zaoyu

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Find your mission with a soul mate better. Don't be too calculative about $$. I used to think too much of $ when younger. Now old, just wish to declutter, clean and “lepak?” with my pet
 
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