Been a month...realise I still like her alot

[fandango]

TS is sounding more and more like a creep

 

[Red Ronin]

TS is sounding more and more like a creep

Don't say that.

Just inexperience of the female mindset.

Happened to me countless times before.

 

[fandango]

Don't say that.

Just inexperience of the female mindset.

Happened to me countless times before.

TS is already bordering on stalking

 

[Red Ronin]

TS is already bordering on stalking

He is a giver who wants to pamper a girl he loves. Nothing wrong with that.

It's just that it will not lead to attraction.

It happened to me in my last crush few years back. I fell for a married woman in her 40s. It didn't turn into an affair and thank goodness it didn't.

She loved blind boxes and whenever I went to Pop Mart I bought something for her and leave it at her desk.

Luckily it didn't work out. I always had a thing for falling for someone I can't be with.


Heng this time is different.

 

[KenQuek]

This is a classic case of how guys becoming needy and appears creepy and even freak out the girl.
Don't worry, many of us went through this.

You haven't even establish a rapport. Stop thinking about how much you like her, you don't even know her well yet. Hold off your feelings and stop the one sided love.

Find a chance to approach her, create some topics that you think both of you will discuss about or participate in. Do not start asking her to be a friend, that is not your intention obviously. You want to avoid being friendzoned.

Treat her like a stranger but with a little more respect. Either make your intentions vague or unclear. Let her wonder about you. Just do not ask to be a friend.

If you have good self control, slowly and eventually you should both be in sync and at the same page. You know your chances and will have the confidence to progress.

 

[Jeremy1]

This thread is useless without picture

 

[Red Ronin]

This is a classic case of how guys becoming needy and appears creepy and even freak out the girl.
Don't worry, many of us went through this.

You haven't even establish a rapport. Stop thinking about how much you like her, you don't even know her well yet. Hold off your feelings and stop the one sided love.

Find a chance to approach her, create some topics that you think both of you will discuss about or participate in. Do not start asking her to be a friend, that is not your intention obviously. You want to avoid being friendzoned.

Treat her like a stranger but with a little more respect. Either make your intentions vague or unclear. Let her wonder about you. Just do not ask to be a friend.

If you have good self control, slowly and eventually you should both be in sync and at the same page. You know your chances and will have the confidence to progress.

Well said...

Build attraction first. Do some risky moves. Don't be boring

 

[Donkey Kong]

TS is sounding more and more like a creep

 

[grevq80o]

Bro, Jiayou!!

 

[fandango]

Bro, Jiayou!!

Don't encourage him lar diu

 

[fandango]

Wah,my first time watching the HD version.

 

[KenQuek]

Hey man... how's things? I've been kinda crazy few weeks for me.


I feel she is drifting away from me. I went in too quick and too fast. I think I screwed up. Asked her out twice but she said she was busy

She disappeared for 2 weeks now... I didn't see her and not texted her.

Maybe she needed some space...

I'm not giving up but I will not be needy and clingy

Just read through the pages. Don't mind i say a few words.

I don't know what you did was quick or considered fast, But asked twice and got rejection means she is not interested. Do not try the 3rd attempt until you built up better rapport with her.

It could also be her currently focused in work or something else and no intention for RS.

Yes do not text her, especially not those daily good mornings or what not.

Everyone bound to have some interest in something. And if you manage to find a common topic it will be best. We guys also have our hobbies, if you have any collections you can bring and place in your office/desk, share with her during a good timing. Create an opportunity to share what you are good in. Even if you have none, changing to workout attire in office during break or after work can get some attention. Let her see you hanging out with decent people, not those loud cranky ones. Mind your language and volume.

Allow her to initiate contact, that's the only way you know your chance is coming. If she come she come.
And lastly, tell yourself that you have already moved on, keep a lookout for other potential targets.

 

[Red Ronin]

Just read through the pages. Don't mind i say a few words.

I don't know what you did was quick or considered fast, But asked twice and got rejection means she is not interested. Do not try the 3rd attempt until you built up better rapport with her.

It could also be her currently focused in work or something else and no intention for RS.

Yes do not text her, especially not those daily good mornings or what not.

Everyone bound to have some interest in something. And if you manage to find a common topic it will be best. We guys also have our hobbies, if you have any collections you can bring and place in your office/desk, share with her during a good timing. Create an opportunity to share what you are good in. Even if you have none, changing to workout attire in office during break or after work can get some attention. Let her see you hanging out with decent people, not those loud cranky ones. Mind your language and volume.

Allow her to initiate contact, that's the only way you know your chance is coming. If she come she come.
And lastly, tell yourself that you have already moved on, keep a lookout for other potential targets.

Agreed with your comments.

She already went out with me once.

I'm gonna build rapport and wait before I ask her out again.

But it should be true that she is very busy due to her job scope

She's not a colleague. She's a member of an exercise club I'm in.

I'm in no rush.

 

[KenQuek]

Agreed with your comments.

She already went out with me once.

I'm gonna build rapport and wait before I ask her out again.

But it should be true that she is very busy due to her job scope

She's not a colleague. She's a member of an exercise club I'm in.

I'm in no rush.

Wow nice! I'm happy to read this.

How's the butterflies in stomach feeling, you will miss it in future haha.

 

[Red Ronin]

Wow nice! I'm happy to read this.

How's the butterflies in stomach feeling, you will miss it in future haha.

Now dun have this feeling anymore.

Last time when I teach her stuff feels nervous but since we got closer and chat more often dun feel nervious.

I'm also not the type to text everyday. I dun text much at all.

I'm not the needy kind. But I think I went in too fast and tried to secure a second date during the first one and she wasn't ready.

 

[Monstruo^]

I just wanna know which guy. Haven't seen her staring at any guy or smiling shyly that kind of thing whenever I see her at company events or anywhere in office, so I wonder if it's a friend and not colleague and what he have that attract her. then maybe I know better how to advance...

Based on the 20 over pages of this thread, can roughly tell you are an overthinker and over analyzer, usually women behave more like this though.

You don’t have to know which guy she likes, and what he has that attracts her, because it will make you over analyze more, no doubt, and your chess moves will be messy.

Also, simply said, if you need to even study your love rival to know how to tackle the woman you like, you already lost liao. Even if that guy ish a BBFA looking type of guy.

You attract the woman using your looks, aura, personal attributes (personality, character, financial, eloquence, humor, etc), voice, actions, etc, it is a whole package. Remember, human is human, product is product. Product can be copied and replaced, but human is more complex. You don’t want to make her feel turn off by you through your actions, you don’t want to make her feel you are a creep and want to siam you, and you don’t spend time studying your rival and learning from there how to advance.

Him is him, you are you. Two different persons. Even if you copy how he looks, acts, talks, dresses, you are still you. He is still who she likes. You cannot copy the chemistry that they have (if they have), the bond, the vibe, the communication, the feelings (emotional, sexual, etc) that she has for him. Similarly, if the guy she likes does not feel the same for her, it is the same logic as above.

I never do this kind of thing. I concentrate on myself instead of other people. If the person I like is attracted to me too, good lor. If not, too bad. If the person likes me but I don’t like the person back, also mybfd. I believe this kind of thing should come natural, not forced, or should come with great efforts. I have never spend much efforts on any of my exes to get them to be with me. If needs to do so much, there is probably a mismatch.

If two persons match well, the conversation will flow well naturally, and feelings would be comfortable and excitement. Too much comfort but no spark, may be just friendship but less romantic pull. Too much nervousness, may be a mismatch. It is not just about whether you have a car or house or not.

 

[Monstruo^]

日久生情? a possibility? Someone posted before and it work for them. If the person try hard enough, there are examples of that in real life, around me too. I have friends who develop feelings for colleague over time and get together, now married with kids. I know effort does not equal reward, but at least I won't regret not putting in effort.

I don’t believe in that. I believe in “no other options at that time”, “lonely”.

This 日久生情 is only a self comforting phrase nia. (Aiya, he/she doesn’t like me now, but maybe he/she will feel for me over time if I do this or that. He/she didn’t give me a chance, how to show him or her who I am? Maybe slowly she will feel for me and appreciate me.)

Does romance work this way? I don’t think so.

Like building muscles in a gym, if go to gym to train 5 days a week, efforts are in, but technique wrong, also like that. But romance is not just about efforts mah. Personally I feel it is more like a match, or not.

You can still try lah… if it doesn’t make you insane and overly obsessed over time. Currently you are quite obsessed liao.

 

[kodomo80]

all of us can say until the cow comes home, end of the day, let TS do what he wants, eventually he will find his way to attract that girl he wants be it this girl or the next. All of us also learn from blunders.

Go for it TS, if u think u r happy doing the current methods, then so be it. At least no regrets even if u dun get the results u want.

 

[Monstruo^]

You are encouraging him to pursue a love that has a low chance of reciprocation..

Sometimes knowing when to give up is important. Getting too vested in this will not have a good outcome.

Some people, the more you tell them don’t do it, the more they wanna try further and do it and prove to you they can. I’m also like that ah, but depends on what matters lor.

 

[feeltherain]

TS is sounding more and more like a creep

Initially I thought he was quite thoughtful and his never say never spirit was inspiring. Now I find him really desperate on this forum , acting very needy and childish and very very attention seeking.

From some of us including me who gave him advice to either confess his love or just give her up (because I think the girl is really not interested in him at all)

TS @plpl20 , please have some self respect for yourself! There are other girls out there.

IT TAKES 2 HANDS TO CLAP.