Need advice on debt

[lovestarrie]

Thank you all. My partner had helped me once again. But of cos i will need to pay him back. Ive handed all my pay to him for managing, and will only take allowance from him for my necessities. This will ensure i wont spend excessivy again as i need to go through him. That way, he can also deduct some from my pay for himself also, to offset the loan he gave me bit by bit.

Like one of you had said, yes, he is angry at me for not telling him i took up the loans. Ive also enrolled myself under the do not lend ban with mlcb. I hope not to go down this path again. I actually felt alot at ease now that i do not have any money on me except my allowance from him.

Just to mentioned the money does not go through me to joint account whatsoever. I told my boss to directly transfer him my pay from next month onwards so he can do what he can. And my pay this month was transferred to his account by myself. As our joint account is under the same bank as my personal account, i gave him my ib token too, just so that i wouldnt touch it. I acknowledge i needed help, and i hope i'll get better.

He's still not talking to me though, but i think he still needs time.

 

[havetheveryfun]

Just to mentioned the money does not go through me to joint account whatsoever. I told my boss to directly transfer him my pay from next month onwards so he can do what he can. And my pay this month was transferred to his account by myself. As our joint account is under the same bank as my personal account, i gave him my ib token too, just so that i wouldnt touch it. I acknowledge i needed help, and i hope i'll get better.

He's still not talking to me though, but i think he still needs time.

just dont be like dork32's ex gf... such guys are not easy to come by.

 

[lovestarrie]

just dont be like dork32's ex gf... such guys are not easy to come by.

I dont want to be like dork32's ex gf, thats why i put everything under his account and not in mine or anything i can have access to.

But sorry dork32, even though im no better, i still think you ex gf is an ass.

 

[ELKYme]

Hi Lovestarrie,

Awesome! I’m so happy for you!!!

Glad that you have also taken the initiative to exclude yourself from any future borrowing! This really shows that you mean it!

Is it possible to share the procedure on doing self self-exclusion from the moneylenders credit bureau?

It’s not stated on their site:
https://www.mlcb.com.sg/FAQ.aspx

The information will be pretty useful for others.

Thank you in advance.

Just to mentioned the money does not go through me to joint account whatsoever. I told my boss to directly transfer him my pay from next month onwards so he can do what he can. And my pay this month was transferred to his account by myself. As our joint account is under the same bank as my personal account, i gave him my ib token too, just so that i wouldnt touch it. I acknowledge i needed help, and i hope i'll get better.

He's still not talking to me though, but i think he still needs time.

 

[Mephist0pheLes]

Probably divorce ...

then u r pwning urself... divorce liao lose wife and half of ur assets to her, on top of the money u lend to her that u will probably nvr be able to recover

 

[lovestarrie]

Hi Lovestarrie,

Awesome! I’m so happy for you!!!

Glad that you have also taken the initiative to exclude yourself from any future borrowing! This really shows that you mean it!

Is it possible to share the procedure on doing self self-exclusion from the moneylenders credit bureau?

It’s not stated on their site:
https://www.mlcb.com.sg/FAQ.aspx

The information will be pretty useful for others.

Thank you in advance.

Thank you ELKYme. Can find the request to ban here: https://www.moneylenders.sg/public-protection.php

Can email them for self inclusion for the ban, they will gladly help. Through the link above, your relatives/parents/spouse/close onescan submit the request on behalf.

I hope i will be better soon and can get batter at managing my financials..

 

[ELKYme]

Thanks for the information!

I’m sure your hubby will do good with your salaries that’s credited to him....juz look forward to a comfortable and nicely renovated BTO soon.

Gentle reminder to cut away the credit cards as well.

Thank you ELKYme. Can find the request to ban here: https://www.moneylenders.sg/public-protection.php

Can email them for self inclusion for the ban, they will gladly help. Through the link above, your relatives/parents/spouse/close onescan submit the request on behalf.

I hope i will be better soon and can get batter at managing my financials..

 

[lovestarrie]

Thanks for the information!

I’m sure your hubby will do good with your salaries that’s credited to him....juz look forward to a comfortable and nicely renovated BTO soon.

Gentle reminder to cut away the credit cards as well.

Im sure he will... I dont have credit cards so no worries on that.

 

[jacky5297]

Doesn’t matter

What would you do if you were the Husband? Let her settle the loan herself knowing that she has to paid 16k instead of 8k, and continue the marriage?

then u r pwning urself... divorce liao lose wife and half of ur assets to her, on top of the money u lend to her that u will probably nvr be able to recover

 

[ELKYme]

Hi Lovestarrie,

Hope you don’t mind me borrowing your thread and “advertising” the link you graciously provided. It may save someone else more pain in future.

Self-exclude borrowing from moneylenders.

How to stop borrowing from moneylenders.

Family borrowing from moneylenders.

https://www.moneylenders.sg/public-protection.php

Hope Google search captures those keywords.

 

[harky]

dont mind if i ask , ts how u become debt?
i mean it rare for lady to go into debt...


well, i do have aunt go into debt.... but it for her entertainment. silly woman.

 

[havetheveryfun]

Hi Lovestarrie,

Hope you don’t mind me borrowing your thread and “advertising” the link you graciously provided. It may save someone else more pain in future.

Self-exclude borrowing from moneylenders.

How to stop borrowing from moneylenders.

Family borrowing from moneylenders.

https://www.moneylenders.sg/public-protection.php

Hope Google search captures those keywords.

were u in debt before ?

 

[ELKYme]

Never Bro, I’m a saver by nature, most importantly. I’m DEBT-FREE! And it feels sooo good.

Redeemed my housing loan sometime back.(Huge portion by cash)
Car purchased with min. loan as it was the agent’s requirement which has also been fully paid.

Guess you’re asking because I’m so zealous in helping those with debts?

Look at the problems some forummers get themselves into due to debt issues. It’s really sad.

Most times it’s the sense of YOLO coupled with the ease of credit (credit cards/cashline) which will than spiral downwards to borrowing from LML and Ah Longs.

Hmmm, think I’ll open a thread on the perils of the credit card to discourage guys from going down this path as CCs are normally the first step to debt....Stay tuned

were u in debt before ?

 

[Nofear40]

my ex owed 15k of cc bills. i did exactly what you mentioned in method 2 with my ex once upon a time. she deposited all her salary into a new joint account. she can draw a max of $3/day for lunch to let her feel the pain. one fine day she withdrew everything from the joint and left me. i am really glad she dumped me. hopeless woman

Similar thing happen to me

 

[havetheveryfun]

Never Bro, I’m a saver by nature, most importantly. I’m DEBT-FREE! And it feels sooo good.

Redeemed my housing loan sometime back.(Huge portion by cash)
Car purchased with min. loan as it was the agent’s requirement which has also been fully paid.

Guess you’re asking because I’m so zealous in helping those with debts?

Look at the problems some forummers get themselves into due to debt issues. It’s really sad.

Most times it’s the sense of YOLO coupled with the ease of credit (credit cards/cashline) which will than spiral downwards to borrowing from LML and Ah Longs.

Hmmm, think I’ll open a thread on the perils of the credit card to discourage guys from going down this path as CCs are normally the first step to debt....Stay tuned��

yep.. u seemed quite concerned about ppl in debts.

but theres the saying also that u can bring a horse to a pond/puddle, but you cant make it drink. thats what happened to dork32 and Nofear40

and based on most ppl experience, money lent out doesnt come back 80-90% of the time... and this means that 80% of the ppl who borrowed the money didnt even change... thats why it is so hard to lend money nowadays from friends/relatives.

 

[harky]

agree on the part where lend $$ to relatives will nv get back even they had $$!! like my aunt. She clear her debt but she nv return my mom $$..

yep.. u seemed quite concerned about ppl in debts.

but theres the saying also that u can bring a horse to a pond/puddle, but you cant make it drink. thats what happened to dork32 and Nofear40

and based on most ppl experience, money lent out doesnt come back 80-90% of the time... and this means that 80% of the ppl who borrowed the money didnt even change... thats why it is so hard to lend money nowadays from friends/relatives.

 

[lovestarrie]

dont mind if i ask , ts how u become debt?
i mean it rare for lady to go into debt...


well, i do have aunt go into debt.... but it for her entertainment. silly woman.

It comes down to not being able to manage my finance, and i think spending excessively? I dont gamble,dont buy branded. I think i spend alot of my dog, food and whatsoever. I keep feeling i do not have enough. I dont know why.

 

[Toni90]

Sell your dog. Cook and it at home.

 

[ELKYme]

Hi Lovestarrie,

When you’re not sure about how your money was spent as u described, it is likely that you’ve never done a budget.

You can try the “zero based budget” system. It works well for 1st timers.

1) Write your salary on a piece of paper (Nett off CPF).
2) Write down EVERY single monthly expense.(Insurance, SingTel, SP, sundries, food, dog food, dog grooming, entertainment, renovation saving, retirement saving, normal savings, etc, etc......)

1-2 MUST equal $0

By doing this, you’re finding a PURPOSE for every single dollar u make.

For a start, you can use the envelope system for everything or just items u tend to overspend:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JGql_e86eDY

You’ll be very aware of your finances by doing this and never get into debt again!

Good luck.

It comes down to not being able to manage my finance, and i think spending excessively? I dont gamble,dont buy branded. I think i spend alot of my dog, food and whatsoever. I keep feeling i do not have enough. I dont know why.

 

[lovestarrie]

Sell your dog. Cook and it at home.

This is uncalled for. You might be unsympathetic, but there isnt any reason for you to say such things as asking somebody to sell and cook their family member.