I dislike this young man that my daughter seems to fancy (at last night's Xmas party)

[chaiscool]

I am not a boomer... not even 40 but in management already.

Those that talk big and like to talk about a lot of topics but when I question them specifically about the issue or ask them what they would do about it, I get shallow responses.

From what I have seen, these people don't perform well compared to the other new hires.

Don't have to be boomer to have boomer mindset lah. You expect what sia from 20+ year old ppl. Of course shallow answer lah, aiyo you last time 20+ year old got so much knowledge and wisdom meh?

Junior role performance imo have no bearing to their future accomplishments. If that's true, then all those successfully ppl won't make it based on their past failures.

Maybe you're too young to be in management based on your mindset and unrealistic expectations. Imo good management see ppl struggling will help them out and not just dismiss them as incompetent.

 

[vangug]

the boy 21yrs old got license to drive already... don't think is from low ses family... can afford to send him get his license at such young age... he has a crucial soft skill at such a young age... that is DPX and speak well... nowadays in this day and age... hard tech skills are really worthless... but TS is right in his analysis that the boy won't amount to much if he can't find any do-ers to leech on... he can be the sales or face of a product or company... but he can't be the creator of something unless he develops those skills first....

 

[roflolmao]

Big Red flag. Own business that is focused on content creation or social media or marketing? poly kia? rented car?

Why your daughter mixing around with these people if she's an oxford grad? Of course he wants to piak her and move up the social ladder lah

nothing wrong with staying in the same area, but everything else i will never take him seriously

 

[Brionic]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

most play boys are sweet talkers, even if average looks and body can seduce girls easily

 

[skylink67]

I think TS just find the guy unreliable and don't like the guy hanging around his daughter like a pest.

 

[chaiscool]

It really depends. Is he hustling during his free time while waiting for university? If yes then maybe still got chance. Else maybe dive deeper into it, like check the company name and etc. People at the age like to duabao, will stop when they grow up.

Ts, speak to your daughter. If he's really the bf, get to know him. Understand him more before judging, ask his coy name and his life goal. If doesn't align then tell your daughter to fk off

Why only justifiable if hustle while waiting for uni? Really asian mindset sia. Amdk in ivy also willing to dropped out to be entrepreneur.

 

[Hot_Dog]

chiur dotter, raw rice become cooked rice liao la, congrats on becoming a grand dad.

 

[champion09]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

so many BBFAs here. you can employ a host of white knights.

 

[chaiscool]

I think TS just find the guy unreliable and don't like the guy hanging around his daughter like a pest.

Adult dotter soon will tell TS she can make her own decisions.

 

[RadioAddict]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

Jiayou. He sounds like a total loser. No one needs to add a liability into their family.

 

[Lemonpeach]

Adult dotter soon will tell TS she can make her own decisions.

We all did that. But regret not listening to our parents for some.

 

[Spike]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

In my opinion, you can be protective of your daughter, but must give her sufficient room and space to make mistakes so she can grow as an individual.

You just need to share your thoughts factually, and be available for her if the heart break eventually comes.

Ultimately, she decides whether she wants to continue or not.

That said, you got every right to cut any financial support or not allow the guy into your house or join any family events.

 

[Lè Crayons]

how do u define shallow responses? what do they normally say?

These people tend to talk a lot and seem passionate about a lot of things. When I ask them specific questions or like if they have the ability to make changes, what would they do. I get shallow responses that appears that he/she has not even thought about the issue they seem so passionate about. I get very short generic answers and then these people will jump on to talk about another unrelated topic.

Ermm... ok...

 

[coyote]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

Ok. Noted.

 

[yesman2978]

Waiting for the boy boy to respond about how he met future father in law, a guai shushu who keep giving him weird stares

About how the lao unker see him no up when he live in the same GCB all his life, when the lao unker live in a tiny hdb. And how he actually don't need to work, just set up biz pass time nia

 

[blue666]

Is not this common?

girls just wanna fun when some boys can give them the emotional value

 

[Lemonpeach]

chiur dotter, raw rice become cooked rice liao la, congrats on becoming a grand dad.

No way. I was a lousy student. But my parents helped, great parents. Picked myself up. Now, doing by ok. Not gonna accept this piece of shat.

 

[Milich]

Understand being worried about ur daughter. ..

But your so judgemental and hv a superiority complex.. felt sry for ur kid(s)

 

[Lemonpeach]

Is not this common?

girls just wanna fun when some boys can give them the emotional value

Damn cheap. This type of boys going no where. In my time, also existed. Egoistic, cocky, didn't want to be looked down, yet no hard work.

Around us in adulthood, plenty.

 

[archie7]

male instinct will tell you whether this guy is good or not
just like in NS, vibes will tell you which guys are chao keng, plp or worker types

basic rule for me is 口花花的男人 不可以相信