I dislike this young man that my daughter seems to fancy (at last night's Xmas party)

[alex22]

Not taking into account this is father meet potential daughter gf, most idiots interview fall into point 3 also. Talk until wu leng wu hor, but actually just making noise

same goes for most edmwers, but we got 20k celery to back it up

It is true, i am edmwer like @RadEoNic

 

[Kaylin]

Can pass anot, @Kaylin approve or want to throw bra into the ring also when see?

what bra into the ring? i not following yr storlee

 

[alex22]

If he is not poor, makes your daughter happy and treats her well, go ahead.

Finding a good and loyal guy is better than an accomplished guy who is always on the lookout.

Yes i agree with DS not just only because we is both zehzeh but actually have good regard for DS posts. Really.

 

[alex22]

Ts should hire a private eye follow this hansum how mani gf he have

Yalo can invest so much into dotter education and lifestyle, what is this small money where it is needed most to fill that gaping hole in TS heart unless he is Liam Neeson

 

[poooff]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

Don’t joke, grasping at straws. If don’t like him then don’t like him, don’t use grand words like social mobility of his PARENTS as a reason. Not everyone as lucky as u to be born right

 

[osirisx]

TS think too far already, that fella just wants to up chiur dotter and dump, pika riaos throw one side... Why TS analyse until like that

 

[metabo]

Your moniker reminds me of @meatbao

Who is meatbao?

 

[Raitei-Q]

Hahaha let see if your parenting is good enough for your daughter to have better judgement

 

[poooff]

I am not a boomer... not even 40 but in management already.

Those that talk big and like to talk about a lot of topics but when I question them specifically about the issue or ask them what they would do about it, I get shallow responses.

From what I have seen, these people don't perform well compared to the other new hires.

AM in banks not considered management

 

[IAmChiobu12M]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

21yo only kena judge this much...or is it a humble brag that U very rich can let Ur daughter be princess n expect her marry a prince?

No wonder bbfa keep complaining cannot find someone LOL

Just Caz Ur era have it lucky to work Ur way up doesn't mean everyone has the same opportunity.

 

[alex22]

Hahaha let see if your parenting is good enough for your daughter to have better judgement

And education which he heavily invested, gep compressed, boarding school in uk

 

[alex22]

One of the 'tests' I use when discussing about child-parent bond is this:

if a child gets pregnant (or impregnated a girl) or get STD, will the child seek the parent/s' help or she/he will 'go settle' herself/himself?

I support this view. Really quite the test.
More so if son is xxr and hv 4 girls with bump, claiming he knock them up and one boi who say he injure him during consensual but rough, refuse to pay hospital fee

 

[Canis Lupus]

TS think too far already, that fella just wants to up chiur dotter and dump, pika riaos throw one side... Why TS analyse until like that

Scared then don't have daughter/son...

 

[alex22]

Scared then don't have daughter/son...

Or only support pink dot (edit- and have no offspring)

 

[davidtkl76]

Before we go off to JP for Xmas and Oshogatsu, my daughter held a mini party at home last evening.

There was this young guy that my daughter seemed happy to chat, joke. I had observed she was always smiling at his humour.

I found out a few things:

1) He rented a car and volunteered to "ferry" a couple of friends to our place. Granted we are in a not so accessible area, he could have shared a Grab ride. I think he is showing off.

2) He darted around our place as if familiar with the setting. It is his first visit. He settled himself, without consideration of himself being merely a visitor, a guest. Acted as if he is the host. No big no small. I have no clue for how long he has met my daughter.

3) At 4 years older than my daughter (21), he completed his NS, Poly, and did a few businesses, as he claimed (or odd jobs as I sensed). I was not a good student, but his 18 points for O level amazed me. He told me he is a startup entrepreneur/marketing consultant. He talks a lot of topics, but shallow in discourse.

4) The family and social gaps are too wide. I grew up in a rental flat. My parents worked hard, upgraded themselves, progressed through the years. My parents were frugal, no gambling, drinking, smoking. This young man has stayed in the same housing estate, same flat since young. I wondered why the lack of upward social and financial mobility. Was there any attempts at hard work, goal-getting, or enjoyed life in the moment? Does he not have a mentor? Role model?

5) He is a damn good, sweet talker. The type that will give way to my daughter momentarily, make her happy, cheerful. Couldn't he employ his EQ for making $$$$, instead of in social conversation?

My hunch tells me this guy is not gonna to achieve much, and there will be no good outcome for my daughter. There is no compatibility. A 3rd rated poly and odd jober versus an Oxford alumnus.

I'm writing this to let out air and to see if any experienced fathers have good advice.

My wife and I will chat with her in JP. I will not leave her alone, with this chap.

I have read too many Edmwer posts and also heard from classmates about non-working husbands, lying flat at home, leeching on the wife. Such a menace, pest.

These are all material things. Important thing is if he would respect and love your daughter.

 

[Wannatalk]

It's natural that parents want the best for their children. But your daughter is just starting out to date and finding her way in life. Just hold back. Some years ago when my daughter was dating, she let on that the guy she was seeing had a intellectually disabled sibling. I wanted to say so many things but held back. Even now, I try not to say anything and just wish for her to be happy. Life is short and for girls, potential dating life is also short. Do you want your daughter to still be dating at 35?

 

[Canis Lupus]

Or only support pink dot

To be fair, one can also don't support Pink Dot and not have offsprings.

 

[mummynew]

I wanted to say so many things but held back.

My son since young was not a 'normal' child - very active and adventurous.

Throughout his growing up years, I had this impulse to stop him from engaging in 'dangerous' acts but almost always I managed to calm myself down with more logical analysis of his needs (vs mine).

He started backpacking around Asia since about 17 yo, making many friends along the way. He loves 'dangerous' type of extreme sports. He holds many 'certs' in all these sports/activities. Nature appeals to him.

He changed me a lot to be a better (calmer) person in a way not to be 'worry sick / naggy' coz of the minute x% probability of 'disasters' that were 'imaginary' in my mind. I am very appreciative/thankful of him in that sense.


*parent-child relationships require a lot of 磨合 and most time, parents need to take the lead when the child is still growing. In a way, the children are actually our 'teachers'.

 

[alex22]

To be fair, one can also don't support Pink Dot and not have offsprings.

Noted, amend post

 

[Raitei-Q]

One of the 'tests' I use when discussing about child-parent bond is this:

if a child gets pregnant (or impregnated a girl) or get STD, will the child seek the parent/s' help or she/he will 'go settle' herself/himself?

I ask this before and they told me "i disown myself , i screw up i will fix it myself, i will make sure my kid and girl/boi have warm home without coming to you to support"

Which made me think " what the hell have i done!? This is too extreme!"