Are we just delusional and kidding ourselves?

[FrogGreen]

I miss the doc sometimes. At least his post are interesting.

 

[Icychemist]

For me, I do not like modern women. Modern women do not like me. I hiam them, they hiam me.

To them, I am buaygan. To me, I have dated and can't find the right one I can trust to be with my whole life.

If got hair, who wants to be botak? If got suitable partner, who wants to be single?

And yet, single is still better than spending life with the wrong partner.

Even people like Kurt Tay can land a wife. A partner can be found if you really want it. The question is, should you?

I still wanna say, a GOOD relationship can only surface when 2 right ones meet.

Everybody wants to meet the right one, but nobody wants to be the RIGHT one.

But once 2 right one meet, the relationship can last a last time.

If not, even if u get married, it'll only eventually end up in divorce. And what's the point of that. It's like walking one big round and going back to the same point.

Maybe that's why x-tian only go for x-tian as they teaches all those rs values at church.

 

[Icychemist]

previously oredi gotch statistics... here ish machiamz only 1% of the whole stinkieland... a cesspool that gathers the worst of the worst toxic peepurz...

only our @articland05 ish the hidden dragon crouching tiger...

Is that really true?

If it's true I hope edmwers can spread more motivation and encouraging words to fellow edmwers.

Why die together when we can flourish together?
Why shoot each other down when we can carry each other up?

 

[Justanewbie]

Sounds like u got red flags...

Not hamsum ma

 

[ThisIsHome]

I still wanna say, a GOOD relationship can only surface when 2 right ones meet.
Everybody wants to meet the right one, but nobody wants to be the RIGHT one.
But once 2 right one meet, the relationship can last a last time.
If not, even if u get married, it'll only eventually end up in divorce. And what's the point of that. It's like walking one big round and going back to the same point.
Maybe that's why x-tian only go for x-tian as they teaches all those rs values at church.

LMAO, even modern christians do not value marriage vows any more.

Personally know of 2x DINK christian couples that divorced.

 

[Travis_Touchdown]

Is that really true?

If it's true I hope edmwers can spread more motivation and encouraging words to fellow edmwers.

Why die together when we can flourish together?
Why shoot each other down when we can carry each other up?

becoz stinkies must pawn stinkies to sleep better at night...

 

[econ food]

this is very typical for my masters class... i am one of the rare pokemon not attached and not married


for sinkies, its hard to do well in early 20s, most sinkies guy get into the workforce at 25/26 due to NS, i would say late 20s merry, early 30s get key and have kids is norm



beh kan bbfa wants love too, but they cannot get, so its true



true, bbfa ish mybfd



tiagong edmw is a cesspool

2000s to 2010s..I thought edmwer forums is full of uncle youngsters.. a lot of theads and run fast. Now come uncle auntie forum?

 

[econ food]

I think some really doing quite well got 2 helper, 1 for each kid leh. While some purposely buy conti car just to prepare the baby arrival and admit in private A ward which 2 nights alr $18k. And some despite have kids still can keep get new branded.

So they are definitely not the simple type. But seems like just normal working class. So I'm curious money comes from where lol.

I'm curious money comes from where lol? Go ask them la. If they said they earn by job income..and can give a snap their payslip..mean they are good..

 

[Eliwood]

Not hamsum ma

Then not a deal breaker. U see how many bui buis with gf and wife outside.

 

[Eliwood]

I'm curious money comes from where lol? Go ask them la. If they said they earn by job income..and can give a snap their payslip..mean they are good..

It depends on how much savings they want as well.

If ok to just have cpf, all the expenses can easily fit within 11 to 12k combined income. Not very difficult.

 

[Justanewbie]

Everyone is different, every relationship are the not the same. Just follow your gut feeling at the point of time, when you slowly ponder your options and determine, which is the option which you think will give you the least regret (or maybe guilt) in the long run.

For me, personally feel that follow your heart and no need to compare, just make sure you live your life in a way that don't have major regrets at your deathbed.

Easier said than done though, cuz sometimes unintentional decisions made in the spur of moment or simply following the flow at the point of time can also proved to be wrong after e.g a few years and you ponder whether if you should have done this or that at the point of time.

No choice, we are made to be like this. Our moods and feelings change every now and then too.

Live the way which you feel suit you the most, not the life people want you to have. It is not easy to tell what are the true feelings of someone is, sometimes I realise some of those that smile the most are actually the ones with the most trouble and just forcing themselves to be positive.

Be true to yourself and not afraid to show your true emotions. People always ask me why do I seem like I am always pondering of stuff at times too.

That is just me, I don't have a high mental capacity and can get overwhelmed at times.

Thus, I always need some time to just take my mind off stuff and slowly think things through.


Honestly, for me myself if not ready and still having doubts better be alone ba. Don't want the negativity arising from my doubts to be passed to someone else, she could possibly be with someone who could give her endless positivity and make her without doubts.

Life is short, most important is to find a sense of purpose ba. Pardon if I digress abit but personally for me, sometimes my most fulfilling moment is actually at work when I get things done and feel a sense of accomplishment.

To the point, where someone called me workaholic. Not that I super like work itself, but sometimes I feel immersing in that environment helps me to find myself and feel that I can be useful and contribute. That is when I feel satisfied but I don't consider myself a workaholic though.

When I get tired out, I also want to quickly leave office and have a dinner/slowly walk home before go back shower then scroll phone/watch shows before enjoying a deep sleep (if possible) la.

Sometimes, people wonder if am siao cuz like to be in office and work lol whereas they like WFH and simply end work on time zhun zhun to avoid OT at all costs.

I used to be like that when I started working after uni. By now uncle already mindset change want a relationship also too old and no longer attractive compared to the yandao 20-30s.

Sometimes don’t think too much just put yourself out there and meet people.
Does not have to develop into a relationship, if it does good, if not also ok.

I realize overthinking often hinders a relationship because I do that too

 

[Encouragesome1]

I see edmw always jjww that single is the way, alone got more money and freedom etc.

It’s a fact nobody can deny

But I see reality (maybe on surface) is that those who are successful at work are also the ones got lucky to bto within 1 or 2 tries, marry early, have kids and have a typical happy family life. Every year holiday with life progressing well.

This one they enjoy also no wrong , it’s their choice their lives.

Early 20s somehow did ok at work, mid 20s marry, late 20s have kids. By early 30 have house, have car, have wife, have kids and helpers le.

If u enjoy yea then it’s good life. Or u don’t then u will think it is just another item in life to do… like sweeping floor or laundry clothes.

Is us behkan bbfa keep jjww say FIRE is best but truth is we just unwanted and behkan. (Besides some troll here but reality are hidden dragons)

I feel can work and can any time say tmr I don’t want this …
Can don’t need die die stick to one work or one boss or can quit as and when and no worry for tmr is fire alr.

Go dating kena hiam, bbfa like us can't score dates or just kena ghosted. Forever stuck in low ses loop worry about next day.

We don’t mind ppl hiam us as long as they wrong one. If it’s the right one n they hiam us we ll be a bit sad but also heaved a sigh of relief.. we don’t need or want headaches down e road. Rather now than later.

While the reality outside people all celebrating next milestones and trying to achieve next goal. Only we here being echo chamers trying to affirm each others misery nia. Correct ma?

We hv milestones … we need on self work than work on other elements of life’s milestones

 

[HumJiBeng]

Didn't know just by basing on a few hundreds out of the 200k+ SMEs can determine the country economy. Your business must be damn huat.

Have u heard of z-score and t-score statistics? Basically U can use sample to test the whole population. It is a proven statistics. U can have 95% confidence level or 99% confidence level based the p value

While I agree mine is not prefect random sampling, the concept should still make sense.

Is like upcoming/previous Singapore election, with the sample count 200 votes already, u more or less know the result for the whole GRC district.

If u watch news during election day, u will see sample count result flashing live before even before all votes are counted. And do far sample results are very accurate

 

[gripen]

Then not a deal breaker. U see how many bui buis with gf and wife outside.

Some were handsome but they just let it go after marriage.
This applies to both sexes.

 

[Kiwi8]

Sads mans.

 

[fearlessImp]

Yes agree with you. I always believe getting attached is damn easy but getting attached to the one you like and like you back and is suitable is damn hard.

So whenever I attend all the boliao wedding dinner, housewarming and baby shower parties, I wonder am I just lousy to not be like them, or they also just look good on surface but maybe also not with the right one?

But somehow I do feel among these people, I'm most behkan. People comfort me by saying I have the worst cards to deal with but maybe is caz I'm destined to have a lousy life that why in the first place I have to deal with trials that normal people don't have to? As a result no matter how I try also already lose from the start.

All relationships need effort to make it work.

 

[jack-320]

EDMWers are just talking nonsense

well you are right

people who are success are successful early

and that is where they get BTO, pro,Orion, high paying salary, wedding, children early as well

life is good

once someone is successful early, they will be set for a smooth life forever where everything just works out for them

life only gets better and better and they grow older, life only grow upwards, not like snake and ladders where you rise and fall, hard life truths

do you ever hear them suddenly fall in life? No, they won’t fall in life

early success means won’t fall in life forever

 

[fearlessImp]

Some are denial, but most are acceptance.

Denial because they cannot find, so they bash women all the way and behave like it is their own choice.

But most here, I feel, are acceptance. They accept that they won't be able to find the one, or they get rejected so many times until they gave up liao. Sometimes I read the stories here I can tell most got rejected very badly until it caused emotional trauma.

I may be delusional too but I feel I fall into this 2nd category, 2nd scenario (rejected terribly or got toyed until gave up). It has come to the point I have a deep distrust in women because my first thought would be, "what games are you trying to play?"

I believe many of us here - men and women who are still single - have become comfortable being single liao. Sometimes the thought that you will share your bed with someone else seems weird. This is true for me especially when I never had a girlfriend before... I doubt I can even allocate time and emotions for her.

Again, I'm not bashing women here... If I'm a woman, I will definitely want to find the top 10% men too; and if I have a daughter, I want her to find the best man; and if I do have a girlfriend, I want her to be happy without suffering... Who wants them to suffer?

Then when we see cost of living keep going up, women's wants and needs also went up, competition among peers and people of your age also go up, you just feel it is not worth it and decide to not bother with all the stresses.

And sorry if I sound repetitive and a misogynist, but most women have unrealistic expectations. Like I shared before, even bui bui women and fugly women have high expectations and play that mass dating game. That's like you apply for a job that only wants to pay you 1.8K but demands you have degree, 5 years of experience, must know how to do coding, be proficient in Microsoft Office apps, must be able to be a leader in team, must be willign to work OT, .etc. Chiobus don't say, they play this game at a new whole level and with rich men only.

If you're not a man, you won't understand... We subconsciously know we have to be the provider and we don't want any of our love ones to suffer. However, we also have this attitude that when things get too overbearing or too much, we will just leave and not bother liao (a.k.a rage quit).

Social media portray too much unrealistic expectations. Be clean, tidy, good health ok alredy. Just saw Edison Chen's pictures in recent New year on Douyin, he really become bbfa. With big eye sack.

 

[Kuudere]

Dual income therefore combined will be better than single income. However parental responsibilities will be much higher . Need lots of energy & time to care for kids - this is more siong than the financial aspect.
In SG , housing is the main big ticket item. Food etc are affordable if you are not fussy.

those friends u have likely very easy going type. I’ve seen kids every weekend their schedule fully packed - easily $2k per month for their enrichment classes

Long time no see, how’s things been?

 

[Kuudere]

Couple both around 30s? Possible cos if both in their 30s, pay shd be around $7- $8k , combined $14- 16k?

Recent report says sg median household income abt $11k + so not surprising

Does median household income in the report include bonus and employer cpf calculations or without?