Adopt or give birth better?

[maui_boy]

steal better

 

[Mr Brown]

Adopt lah

U see Pap import ready made foreign talents or nurture footballers from YOG go Suzuki Cup

 

[razorlala]

Same happened to my uncle, adopted 3 kids, end up

1st daughter become bar girl
2nd son craftsman - decent life
3rd son grey, take drug

Most babies up for adoption, come from problematic family, unweb mum, gambler dad, etc.

So, the gene can't be changed, all 3 can't study type, pri sch max

Sent from Xiaomi HM NOTE 1LTE using GAGT

so true. a person's nature cant be changed. same gene in 2 diff environment also end up same result.

 

[fish&chips]

Get married first
Find a job...tot u looking for a job?
Give birth...the kids hvg ur desirable n undesiable traits then equate to made fm ur factory n uniquely yours...

 

[Peony牡丹]

That's worse than natural birth. The recovery process is pure torture.

Not say pure torture, but definitely longer n tougher than natural birth recovery.

 

[Peony牡丹]

so true. a person's nature cant be changed. same gene in 2 diff environment also end up same result.

Nature vs nurture. I believe with the right nurturing n committed parenting, most will turn out just fine.

We dunno what kind of parenting those kids goes through to becomes who they are today.

 

[xboxer]

Maybe law/ time have changed, now SG law very supportive to adoptive families.

Last time means 1980s. So now can easily adopt?

 

[Peony牡丹]

My first aunt was adopted by my grandparents. She grew up just fine like her other sisters.

One of my aunt was given away for adoption, she lived a better life n have better achievements than her sisters who wasn't given away.

My youngest aunt-in-law was also given away to a better family, brought up in Angmo speaking family, go overseas study ect. Also living better than her siblings who isn't given away. Life path average lo...

 

[duameatball]

Nature vs nurture. I believe with the right nurturing n committed parenting, most will turn out just fine.

We dunno what kind of parenting those kids goes through to becomes who they are today.

Agree. A kid with good genes will still turn out bad with poor parenting.

 

[Peony牡丹]

Last time means 1980s. So now can easily adopt?

As long as you and your spouse are decent people with healthy environment for the child, very often the adoption no problem one.

Basic thing is parents have to go for preadoption workshop, get interviewes n assessments by MSF ect.

 

[Lexmerc]

Can try to be foster parents first.

The church I wen to last time, the pastor family had 4 blood children then wen on to adopt their last baby girl.

This happened really long ago so maybe the rule now no longer exist? I believe they were worried that the parents may treat the blood child and the adopted one differently so they didn't approve. My cousins they really love children and end up now only 1 kid cos got difficulty producing and cannot adopt. Now too old to adopt liao even if the rules have soften.

 

[Peony牡丹]

This happened really long ago so maybe the rule now no longer exist? I believe they were worried that the parents may treat the blood child and the adopted one differently so they didn't approve. My cousins they really love children and end up now only 1 kid cos got difficulty producing and cannot adopt. Now too old to adopt liao even if the rules have soften.

Could be lo... like xboxerx was sharing, last time wen his relatives trying to adopt, really very difficult.

 

[TrollAndOgres]

She wan give birth just let her give birth till she heypi loh


Then she can't complain of the pain what.

 

[Mancunian2]

Nature vs nurture. I believe with the right nurturing n committed parenting, most will turn out just fine.

We dunno what kind of parenting those kids goes through to becomes who they are today.

nature lah

In both cases I mentioned , adopted parents' own children turned out fine,
but the adopted children revert to their true nature despite being given more nurturing

cannot overcome bad genes one

 

[jdepaul2]

Can adopt me?

I'm very cute.

 

[Ethan_]

Actually there is no such law in SG.

Any legally married couples above 21yo can adopt.

So its still couple can adopt, not single individual?

 

[Ethan_]

adopt , what if you get problematic kids

among relatives and friends, I know of 3 cases
1. adopted son problematic gambler, and the gambler's son bisexual, married but created scandals
2. adopted daughter stupid genes, failed psle 2 times, grown up Liao but now seldom contact
3. only happy case. adopted daughter grown and up and now big4 audit partner, filial to adopted parents

Think nowadays many own kids also got attitude problem.

Think as long as responsible enough for the character development, don't see much issue. Don't adopt for adopting sake and leave the kid to its own. Often how many turn out think is not so much with the external possessions but the inner development. Many parents never put enough effort into their child mental and character development.

 

[Peony牡丹]

So its still couple can adopt, not single individual?

Female individuals can adopt but I forgot the age. Should be above 21too.

Single males cannot.

 

[Peony牡丹]

nature lah

In both cases I mentioned , adopted parents' own children turned out fine,
but the adopted children revert to their true nature despite being given more nurturing

cannot overcome bad genes one

What I meant is, no single factor can determine a person's life path.

Bad genes can be a wide range, there is no perfect person. Everyone of us carries good n bad genes be it physically or personality. Afterwards it's our environment + human relationships + exposure + experiences + nature that adds up to determine which path we take.

 

[KnyghtRyder]

I am just wondering cause my gf wants 3 children. I dont want her to go through the pain of pregnancy and labour 3 times. So jist thinking of having just 1 and adopt another 2 instead. I am very open to such things. What do you all think?

have triplets then only 1 pregnancy and 1 delivery