Hi everybody, I have been reading this thread for the longest time ever since I accidentally found out that my bf is searching for a ring but waiting v Long and nth happened. Always reading just for fun and some knowledge about the diamond since I’m never an expert and wondering how it is like from the guys point of view.
I’ve been in dilemma for a few months now and typing this bcuz I am
Almst at my wits end and have nobody to say this to. And the latest postings are somewhat similar to what I hve been facing.Never expected some ladies thou.
From the start of our years of relationship I had mentioned I Wan a 1 carat and nth much I Wan in terms of any gift or anything of monetary value. But 1 carat must.
In the years of our relationship I also joke about the carat v v often but I always emphasis on the 1 carat.
Bf always say 1 carat or 10k whichever higher.
For years we joke and talked about it.
Frenz around us almst all got married but not me even thou we were togther for a longer time. He asked before if I mind and I said I didn’t.
Many occasions he asked what would I like for bday anniversary and so on and I always said nth Juz add to the carat.
He had offered branded bags accessories and so on. But I just didn’t want them. Tbh, I’m not interested and I don’t Wan to burden my partner with the Budget for the ring.
But I really Wan it v v much. So to me, I give up the many gifts on the many occasions den no Nid waste money and cn save money for the carat or more money for the carat.
I’m not materialistic but to me bcuz it is gg to b worn on me for life and I have told him I will never ask for an upgrade and if I have to choose to sacrifice anything or choose something most impt in the wedding eg,gown, banquet, bridal shoot and so on. I would rather hve more Budget for the ring bcuz I’m gg to wear it for life. I have to like it.
We are not toking about 20k or so is 10k so to me it is not very very high Budget but it shud b able to get me a substantial diamond.
And good things are worth waiting for rte ? So doesn’t matter if everybody gets married before me.
He did ask mi to go down with him but I refused.probabaly still traditional and feel weird.
But end of the day , i didn’t get a 1 carat. Or close.
It was a 0.7x d vs1
I accidentally saw the scopes about 7-8 months before he proposed but I didn’t want to spoil it so I acted like I didn’t noe. But I was really disappointed so I dropped plenty of hints saying 0.7x really cannot 0.8 also cannot something lidat.
The ring didn’t turn out how I expected it to be at all.
I am not ngry.
My partner is great really great in every aspect.
But what really upsets me is that I usually don’t have much I Wan and I’m usually indecisive but this is the one thing that I am v sure and have Told him straight in the face but didn’t get.
When I couldn’t hold it and ask he says bcuz he feels it is the best and big enuf and worry ppl think is fake bcuz he dun earn that much and so on.i even questioned tht is not even 10k y didn’t he max the Budget.
I didn’t ask for branded or best I only wanted 1 carat and bling with side diamonds.
I was devasted I hate myself up till today and am still gg thru the emotions every few days every other days sometimes I don’t even Wan to wear it.sometyms wen I c it it also reminds mi of what I didn’t get.
He is 30+ and I am close.
I really hate myself for saying all of these and feeling all of these bcuz like I said he is great he wants the best for me and so on I try really hard to brainwash myself I Google a lot and to tell myself it’s ok it’s about the love and so on but every few days the emotions come to me.i don’t really know how Long is this gg to last.
But it is so devastating.
I don’t know how to deal with myself anymore.
I have questions and query in my mind Everyday how come this happened I spoke to him and we feel upset.
I will not do an upgrade bcuz of sentimental reasons he hates the halo and I Thnk upgrading will not justify the price.
What am I supposed to do
Is like for years of ur life you aimed to be the ceo .
So ppl kept promoting faster den you and it doesn’t matter u kept working hard bcuz u aimed something higher.
But end of the day u didn’t get it you got promoted same as the rest of the ppl despite your initial goal and working hard for years thnking u will get there and on the way u rejected all other offers from other company only to end up same as the rest.it didn’t bring you to ur desired goal/position.
Anybody can advise?
Sorry for the Long story
