Divorce Procedure -

[iam7377]

Need some advice.

I have separated with my wife with conditions (fair to me) and we signed at the deeds at the lawyer firm.

However, after few months, she turned nasty and wanted to change the terms to her favour and asked for divroce and the new unreasonable terms.

What is the chance if i go contested divorce now, citing that she agreed with the reasonable terms previously.

Can check with your lawyer?

Why the sudden change? Could be family or friends brainwash her?

 

[TiedInsurer]

But is not fair lei... I think most SG Girls are like that... Seen quite a few...

You cannot insist on fairness in a relationship. It will never be fair. If you cannot tolerate then your only choice is to be monk.

 

[Mecisteus]

Need some advice.

I have separated with my wife with conditions (fair to me) and we signed at the deeds at the lawyer firm.

However, after few months, she turned nasty and wanted to change the terms to her favour and asked for divroce and the new unreasonable terms.

What is the chance if i go contested divorce now, citing that she agreed with the reasonable terms previously.

Get back to your lawyer lor.

Already signed right ?

How can anyhow change mind.

 

[iam7377]

You cannot insist on fairness in a relationship. It will never be fair. If you cannot tolerate then your only choice is to be monk.

Yeah, that the lesson I learned. Very painful lesson.

 

[iam7377]

Get back to your lawyer lor.

Already signed right ?

How can anyhow change mind.

Yeah, then why sign contract for what, if can change so easily...

 

[d3n]

Need some advice.

I have separated with my wife with conditions (fair to me) and we signed at the deeds at the lawyer firm.

However, after few months, she turned nasty and wanted to change the terms to her favour and asked for divroce and the new unreasonable terms.

What is the chance if i go contested divorce now, citing that she agreed with the reasonable terms previously.

contested jin siong... as long as she didn't sign on uncontested condition, she can still retract her decisions and go for contested.

not favorable to guys.

basically both assets will be pooled together to derive a weightage to split.

direct contribution (monetary - you and her savings + cpf + investment etc) = X% from the pool asset eg, your total is 500K, hers is 300K , total pool money is 800K, you are 62% , she is 38%
indirect contribution (non monetary - taking care of family, parents, housework etc) = Y% (try go for 50% - 50% both agreeable, otherwise if she gets higher % for indirect, it will pull down you overall weightage)

overall weightage = X% + Y% = split weightage from the pool amount will be the final split $$ for you and her.

dun scrimp on getting a good lawyer to fight for you. and try not to drag the process too long.

 

[Yuripa]

Good news is we sort out our issues. Hopefully it stays that way...

I really appreciate your advise...

Glad to hear

I would still advise you and maybe her to attend counseling sessions -

1) Verbalize ur personal issues and have a long term resolution
2) Verbalize her personal issues and have a long term resolution
3) Eventually attend together as a couple and resolve together as a couple

Long life ahead and many chapters to write together

Add oil and all the best TS!!

 

[iam7377]

Glad to hear

I would still advise you and maybe her to attend counseling sessions -

1) Verbalize ur personal issues and have a long term resolution
2) Verbalize her personal issues and have a long term resolution
3) Eventually attend together as a couple and resolve together as a couple

Long life ahead and many chapters to write together

Add oil and all the best TS!!

But I not sure. Coz she rather sensitive lei... Later trigger lei, let me think...

Anyway thanks for your support and ideas, really appreciated it.

 

[Yuripa]

But I not sure. Coz she rather sensitive lei... Later trigger lei, let me think...

Anyway thanks for your support and ideas, really appreciated it.

3 types of control -
1) Control yourself
2) Control other people
3) Control situation

In reality you can only control urself, so you should consider going to counseling on ur own 1st. And actually, the counselor will give you recommendations etc on how to take things for her from all ur own sessions.

Anyway, food for thought. See how you wanna take things from here on.

 

[Kia7200]

Any advises on how to identify n avoid problematic non wife material

Like her behavior n things she always say?

Btw is she ur first relationship? Many members advised u dont give her ur share of the house, she wont appreciate too. Since when she appreciate ur contribution right? She most likely a typical sg female that leech till u buatahan

 

[grevq80o]

We talk it out the past few days, but got quarrel abit, she wanted fetch me but I took.bus to another place.

When I came home, she talk to me and we decide to sort things out, I am unsure how long it lasted before we quarrel again...

Hope things work out. Good to talk it out... but i think just go with flow is the best. Always be real to yourself. Gotch good friend or good relative can also confide in them for support.

 

[Spike]

We talk it out the past few days, but got quarrel abit, she wanted fetch me but I took.bus to another place.

When I came home, she talk to me and we decide to sort things out, I am unsure how long it lasted before we quarrel again...

In my opinion, you can try to live apart for sometime, and bringing her out for dates again.

 

[iam7377]

3 types of control -
1) Control yourself
2) Control other people
3) Control situation

In reality you can only control urself, so you should consider going to counseling on ur own 1st. And actually, the counselor will give you recommendations etc on how to take things for her from all ur own sessions.

Anyway, food for thought. See how you wanna take things from here on.

Makes sense. Wise words. I never thought of this before...

Let me think it through.

Once again, big thanks to you...

 

[kyokoto]

Hi Bro, I have sorted out my issues. Can PM me if need a listening ear...

I hope you resolve the root cause of this because sometimes we just forget it and move on but as long as the root cause remains unsolved, its dangerous.

 

[SpeedingBullet]

Need some advice.

I have separated with my wife with conditions (fair to me) and we signed at the deeds at the lawyer firm.

However, after few months, she turned nasty and wanted to change the terms to her favour and asked for divroce and the new unreasonable terms.

What is the chance if i go contested divorce now, citing that she agreed with the reasonable terms previously.

Very hard to tell, it all depends on the judge on the day itself. Have a good lawyer, make sure u have all the receipts. Good luck

 

[Emperor_Hippo]

View and decision are self centered...

U have 2 choices:
- Get rid of her thru an annulment.
- Force urself on her and let her pop a baby and HOPE the baby will change her.

the former would be easier.

 

[Yuripa]

Any advises on how to identify n avoid problematic non wife material

Like her behavior n things she always say?

Btw is she ur first relationship? Many members advised u dont give her ur share of the house, she wont appreciate too. Since when she appreciate ur contribution right? She most likely a typical sg female that leech till u buatahan

Couple should be able to be open and can compromise with each other.

If 1 side keeps giving in to the other, this is a 1 way street. Not healthy.

It will wear down the giver and in turn the relationship will deteriorate.

If for some reason, either party in the relationship is unable to compromise after being in an open communication relationship, then its better to evaluate the situation and ask themselves if that particular issue will be a deal breaker or not.

If can agree to disagree, then good. Suck thumb and move on together as couple without permanent resentment.

If can't agree means deal breaker. Short pain better than long pain.

 

[hwarzoner]

staying single to avoid unnecessary divorce mess. save more money and have more mental well being.

we human came alone and go alone, human being is suppose to be staying single and not getting married

 

[Kia7200]

Couple should be able to be open and can compromise with each other.

If 1 side keeps giving in to the other, this is a 1 way street. Not healthy.

It will wear down the giver and in turn the relationship will deteriorate.

If for some reason, either party in the relationship is unable to compromise after being in an open communication relationship, then its better to evaluate the situation and ask themselves if that particular issue will be a deal breaker or not.

If can agree to disagree, then good. Suck thumb and move on together as couple without permanent resentment.

If can't agree means deal breaker. Short pain better than long pain.

A beta simp guy will allow such sg female to be their partner or friends. The same sg female if she is together with another man with principles n dignity , she will behave differently.

From the beginning a man should let her know where is ur boundaries. If u too simp n worship her, she will treat u with no respect