Serious Relationship issue

[ZETMAN]

I just send her flowers to her office with an apology card. She replied thank you and pls give me space and time. She still ignore me, sleep separate room.

i'm gonna be the crystal ball gypsy and do fortune telling


there is someone else in the equation. right now she is deliberating how to end things with u. she might be playing a tug of war internally between what she wants and her moral chastising her. but rest assure, her wants are winning. u r putting up a struggle but the end is inevitable.

 

[harky]

Gonna be the wet blanket and naysayer in this entire episode.

There are somethings that both man and woman should understand from the start.

1. Don't overestimate yourself and believe that you have the ability to change the person after getting together or after marriage
2. Dont believe what they say, observe what they do. Even if they tell you that they will change after marriage or getting into the rs, it is just words that holds no volume. The promise to change can just as easily be lies
3. There is meaning to the saying " Leopard never change its spot". How the person is before getting together is how the person will be after getting together. Don't expect them to change unless there is a life changing event.
4. If there is a sudden change in life pattern or behavior, it usually means some other forces are at play here.

if she likes partying and pubbing before the rs/marriage. it is not going to change when she gets into rs/marriage. Changes comes from within, not from the partner. Unless she got sick of the partying vibe and pub scene, what you say is gonna falls on deaf ears.

can explain No4?
If there is a sudden change in life pattern or behavior, it usually means some other forces are at play here.

 

[SpicyBird]

Back in the 70s already have song about "yes it's sad to belong to some else, when the right one comes along"

but how to know if it's the right one? There can be 100 right ones around the world. Can't possibly be with all right?

 

[harky]

I just send her flowers to her office with an apology card. She replied thank you and pls give me space and time. She still ignore me, sleep separate room.

maybe u should just ignore her.. if do too much she will say u very fan and annying.
U should just focus on ur child now.
Travel oversea...

and think backup plan.. if u lose her...
i feel u because my ex also did this to me...

 

[SpicyBird]

I just send her flowers to her office with an apology card. She replied thank you and pls give me space and time. She still ignore me, sleep separate room.

I know you didnt wanna let go but this girl just doesn't seems to be the one that you can see bigger things together if she can just walk off from a marriage after arguments. That's her character and that's her.

 

[0nePunchm@n]

if can confirm she got 3rd party then no hope liao..
the excitement & hopes she wishes for is now on the other guy.

 

[fandango]

but how to know if it's the right one? There can be 100 right ones around the world. Can't possibly be with all right?

You will know one lar.

You have gf or not? You merid?

 

[SpicyBird]

You will know one lar.

You have gf or not? You merid?

What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't mean when another right one come along then u dump the old one. Because there could be so many right ones around. this is 喜新厌旧 already.

 

[ZETMAN]

can explain No4?
If there is a sudden change in life pattern or behavior, it usually means some other forces are at play here.

if the person suddenly secretive and/or pick fights out of nothing, it could be either that they have some other agenda or someone else that is tugging their attention.

 

[harky]

What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't mean when another right one come along then u dump the old one. Because there could be so many right ones around. this is 喜新厌旧 already.

human are 喜新厌旧

 

[SpicyBird]

human are 喜新厌旧

Not all bah but this kind are obviously not the ones you should be marrying in the first place...

 

[midnightinparis]

I just send her flowers to her office with an apology card. She replied thank you and pls give me space and time. She still ignore me, sleep separate room.

Bro the more you do this, the more she won’t like you. Serious.

my heart goes out to you and I wish u all the best

 

[fandango]

What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't mean when another right one come along then u dump the old one. Because there could be so many right ones around. this is 喜新厌旧 already.

You must ask these couples, how they got together in the first place? What made them decide to get married. Then the answer is clear.

 

[ZETMAN]

human are 喜新厌旧

not all. but truth be told, if it happens, there is no point salving.

this is coming from someone whom has 2 dark green beret + one semi green beret before.

 

[grevq80o]

she dun love u anymore....
please be gracious and learn to "let go"

guys always said "love love", actually is hurting them.
if 1 truly love someone, will let her do what she wanted.

but got kids liao... should overwrite everything else ya?

 

[ZETMAN]

What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't mean when another right one come along then u dump the old one. Because there could be so many right ones around. this is 喜新厌旧 already.

i will like to nitpick on ur words.

There are no right ones.

There are just ppl whom have less wrongs.

The fixation with seeking for the right ones is a root cause for all these issues because there will always be better players that comes along.

Instead, we shld be looking for partners which are decent for us and less wrong for us to develop the rs with. Content is the key.

 

[MajiMax]

i will like to nitpick on ur words.

There are no right ones.

There are just ppl whom have less wrongs.

The fixation with seeking for the right ones is a root cause for all these issues because there will always be better players that comes along.

Instead, we shld be looking for partners which are decent for us and less wrong for us to develop the rs with. Content is the key.

Your post reminds me of sermon series I watched many years ago

https://www.christianpost.com/news/andy-stanley-dispels-the-right-person-myth.html

 

[Kwein]

TS go watch the NTR series you will know what's go on better

 

[wongminmin]

but got kids liao... should overwrite everything else ya?

after divorce, they are still ur kids. no diff
kids isn't the reason to bind couple tgt..... kids will grow up 1 day and got their own family, their own happiness.

七年之痒，是指婚姻进入第七年时，人们可能对婚后生活的平淡规律感到无聊乏味，而经历外遇等危机的考验。
When relationship become plain and meaningless, why force to be tgt......there no happiness.

 

[Kayaprata]

I just send her flowers to her office with an apology card. She replied thank you and pls give me space and time. She still ignore me, sleep separate room.

The fact that you do this and she still refuse to talk to you means really over liao.

similar thing happened to me except that i don’t have kids. Sometimes you really need to 一刀两断 for you to see the truth…