Unreasonable Neighbour

[tinwhistle83]

If you are super sensitive, then you should be closing the windows and door then.

Switch on the aircon or humidifier in the living room.

Or be more careful when selecting a house.

well you never know your neighbour until u stayed in there.

dont really like aircon. as much as possible, unless its hot i dont like to sleep with aircon too.

 

[cyke69sg]

well you never know your neighbour until u stayed in there.

dont really like aircon. as much as possible, unless its hot i dont like to sleep with aircon too.

Is it your first time stay landed?

 

[Nemesis_lane123]

Can tell me how to deal with unreasonable neighbour?

As last 2 months there was an increase of mosquito, my neighbour started to spray insecticide every day or other day within his house compound, however the area he sprayed is quite near to my living room window and everytime they spray, the smell will drift to my living room. however when they spray, they will know when they spray so they can quickly escape back to their own house and close their door while we have to breathe in their insecticide. its quite bad that sometimes it drifted all the way to my dining area.

so they started spraying somewhere in dec, then we tolerated till feb and we felt its like going on forever. so last week i tried to be nice and gave the owner's sister (who is staying there too) those electrical mosquito device that can zap mosquito and suggested to them to use. so this week they started spraying again, and i tried to speak to them but they were very hostile. the owner said he has been staying 40 years + and no issue until we came. cos when we first moved, their tree was infringing to our side so my husband asked him to trim it as legally we had every right to do so. this was only 2-3 months, after we moved in as the tree branches was growing to our side and affecting the fixture we had on our area. also my helper complained the tree had too many leaves and keep dropping to our compound, and attracting too many birds which fly past and pooed on our laundry. now when we told him about the insecticide thing, he felt we are picking bones at him. he said the behind neighbours also not happy with us cos of the trees. to be fair, in the end the tree that is at the neighbours at the back, we paid people money to trim it down ourselves because after checking with behind neighbours they said its not theirs as it was just nice growing on the fence and public drain area. so this neighbour at our side, just need to pay money to trim his tree because that was obviously growing in his garden. we had 2 young children in the house. and its only now in feb that we brought this up after 2 months cos its been too long of almost daily spraying of insecticide.

its an old uncle and his sister at 80+ years old age. sorry to say, but felt such boomers only think of themselves and not others. and funny thing is they dont pay for waste removal service but they will walk 30m to the public tree and throw their waste there.

how do you think i should go about? my in law felt we should not spoil neighbourly relationships but maybe tolerate and try to pacify them to be on their good side cos she said we have young children so we are always at the losing end.

Why not go talk to the PA the neighbourhood committee ask u mediate. Getting a middle man better than u dealing with this.

 

[tinwhistle83]

Is it your first time stay landed?

yes. but hub stayed in landed since teens

 

[tinwhistle83]

Why not go talk to the PA the neighbourhood committee ask u mediate. Getting a middle man better than u dealing with this.

i spoke to this. apparently if u go MP for help they will refer you here to

https://cmc.mlaw.gov.sg/apply-for-mediation/disputes-suitable-for-mediation/

 

[tinwhistle83]

maybe they also upset that my family is noisy. cos we got 2 very active boys. they may fight, play or cry at home. my elder is quite mischevioua

 

[waiken]

report nea to check if they breeding mozzies else why nid frequent insecticide spray

 

[cyke69sg]

maybe they also upset that my family is noisy. cos we got 2 very active boys. they may fight, play or cry at home. my elder is quite mischevioua

Possible.

Dealing with people is always a headache especially when there is disagreement or unpleasant things to discuss about or have to compromise or convince the other party to change etc.

Like I said before it's a case of having to negotiate with the neighbor or be able to influence the neighbor to choose to change something they are used to doing.

I think you have to first get to be on good terms with them. I know this is difficult. But it is much harder to get someone who dislikes you to make concessions for you no matter what the law or the rules say and who is in the right.

Here's some suggestions:

Be a good listener Encourage others to talk about themselves, Show empathy, Respond in a way that shows you value their thoughts and experiences, Maintain eye contact, and Nod or respond appropriately.

Show appreciation

• Give honest, sincere compliments and gratitude
• Praise the slightest improvement
• Make the other person feel important

Avoid criticism

• Don't criticize, condemn, or complain
• Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly
• Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person
• Let the other person save face
• The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it

Become genuinely interested in others

• Smile
• Remember that a person's name is to that person the most important sound in any language
• Talk in terms of the other person's interests
• Find common interests or experiences that you can discuss

 

[Capitalist]

Or be more careful when selecting a house.

new neighbors can move in AFTER one is in, no?

 

[wahkau]

In a rich man thread kpkb

 

[ctstalin]

Haha rich man problem

 

[deathan9el]

haolian thread in disguise?

some of us peasants hdb dwellers here already facing issues of their own

in anw, try seeking MP's help/advise?

 

[mel1888]

Can tell me how to deal with unreasonable neighbour?

As last 2 months there was an increase of mosquito, my neighbour started to spray insecticide every day or other day within his house compound, however the area he sprayed is quite near to my living room window and everytime they spray, the smell will drift to my living room. however when they spray, they will know when they spray so they can quickly escape back to their own house and close their door while we have to breathe in their insecticide. its quite bad that sometimes it drifted all the way to my dining area.

so they started spraying somewhere in dec, then we tolerated till feb and we felt its like going on forever. so last week i tried to be nice and gave the owner's sister (who is staying there too) those electrical mosquito device that can zap mosquito and suggested to them to use. so this week they started spraying again, and i tried to speak to them but they were very hostile. the owner said he has been staying 40 years + and no issue until we came. cos when we first moved, their tree was infringing to our side so my husband asked him to trim it as legally we had every right to do so. this was only 2-3 months, after we moved in as the tree branches was growing to our side and affecting the fixture we had on our area. also my helper complained the tree had too many leaves and keep dropping to our compound, and attracting too many birds which fly past and pooed on our laundry. now when we told him about the insecticide thing, he felt we are picking bones at him. he said the behind neighbours also not happy with us cos of the trees. to be fair, in the end the tree that is at the neighbours at the back, we paid people money to trim it down ourselves because after checking with behind neighbours they said its not theirs as it was just nice growing on the fence and public drain area. so this neighbour at our side, just need to pay money to trim his tree because that was obviously growing in his garden. we had 2 young children in the house. and its only now in feb that we brought this up after 2 months cos its been too long of almost daily spraying of insecticide.

its an old uncle and his sister at 80+ years old age. sorry to say, but felt such boomers only think of themselves and not others. and funny thing is they dont pay for waste removal service but they will walk 30m to the public tree and throw their waste there.

how do you think i should go about? my in law felt we should not spoil neighbourly relationships but maybe tolerate and try to pacify them to be on their good side cos she said we have young children so we are always at the losing end.

u can put up those hard plastic boards. Get it tall enough so some of the smell wont filter to u.

 

[Kanko San]

Possible.

Dealing with people is always a headache especially when there is disagreement or unpleasant things to discuss about or have to compromise or convince the other party to change etc.

Like I said before it's a case of having to negotiate with the neighbor or be able to influence the neighbor to choose to change something they are used to doing.

I think you have to first get to be on good terms with them. I know this is difficult. But it is much harder to get someone who dislikes you to make concessions for you no matter what the law or the rules say and who is in the right.

Here's some suggestions:

Be a good listener Encourage others to talk about themselves, Show empathy, Respond in a way that shows you value their thoughts and experiences, Maintain eye contact, and Nod or respond appropriately.

Show appreciation

• Give honest, sincere compliments and gratitude
• Praise the slightest improvement
• Make the other person feel important

Avoid criticism

• Don't criticize, condemn, or complain
• Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly
• Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person
• Let the other person save face
• The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it

Become genuinely interested in others

• Smile
• Remember that a person's name is to that person the most important sound in any language
• Talk in terms of the other person's interests
• Find common interests or experiences that you can discuss

NO use.
My family was harassed by a noisy family for 10 years.
They refused to go meet RC, TC or CMC.
We tried talk to them n put a post tik to asked them lower their noise.
Tried talking to them n in the end, they issue our family with PPO.
Cos he is rich n I am poor, accepted the Consented PPO.
Yet the noise didn't stop but become worse.
I am thinking of getting crowd funding to ask them go to court to reduce their noise that were affecting my family health.
Not that I don't want to move but my finance don't permit.

 

[brandatics]

well you never know your neighbour until u stayed in there.

dont really like aircon. as much as possible, unless its hot i dont like to sleep with aircon too.

hmm if like this, can only hope your neighbour suddenly experience something which make him realized your POV and have a change of heart

 

[0768086]

Going through CMC is the best choice. Both parties discuss the issue with the mediator and hope to come to an amicable solution. Whatever is agreed will be recorded and signed by both party. If either party did not comply, can engage lawyer and file a magistrate order to seek further enforcement. Alternative is CDRT after CMC failed.

 

[TimsTom]

Can tell me how to deal with unreasonable neighbour?

As last 2 months there was an increase of mosquito, my neighbour started to spray insecticide every day or other day within his house compound, however the area he sprayed is quite near to my living room window and everytime they spray, the smell will drift to my living room. however when they spray, they will know when they spray so they can quickly escape back to their own house and close their door while we have to breathe in their insecticide. its quite bad that sometimes it drifted all the way to my dining area.

so they started spraying somewhere in dec, then we tolerated till feb and we felt its like going on forever. so last week i tried to be nice and gave the owner's sister (who is staying there too) those electrical mosquito device that can zap mosquito and suggested to them to use. so this week they started spraying again, and i tried to speak to them but they were very hostile. the owner said he has been staying 40 years + and no issue until we came. cos when we first moved, their tree was infringing to our side so my husband asked him to trim it as legally we had every right to do so. this was only 2-3 months, after we moved in as the tree branches was growing to our side and affecting the fixture we had on our area. also my helper complained the tree had too many leaves and keep dropping to our compound, and attracting too many birds which fly past and pooed on our laundry. now when we told him about the insecticide thing, he felt we are picking bones at him. he said the behind neighbours also not happy with us cos of the trees. to be fair, in the end the tree that is at the neighbours at the back, we paid people money to trim it down ourselves because after checking with behind neighbours they said its not theirs as it was just nice growing on the fence and public drain area. so this neighbour at our side, just need to pay money to trim his tree because that was obviously growing in his garden. we had 2 young children in the house. and its only now in feb that we brought this up after 2 months cos its been too long of almost daily spraying of insecticide.

its an old uncle and his sister at 80+ years old age. sorry to say, but felt such boomers only think of themselves and not others. and funny thing is they dont pay for waste removal service but they will walk 30m to the public tree and throw their waste there.

how do you think i should go about? my in law felt we should not spoil neighbourly relationships but maybe tolerate and try to pacify them to be on their good side cos she said we have young children so we are always at the losing end.

I also have hostile ones. In the wrong and when i tell him nicely, still need kena kan from him. At least ur neighbors are old, tahan a few more years and begone ur troubles (not cursing them but nature is so, everyone passes away.)

 

[Kanko San]

I also have hostile ones. In the wrong and when i tell him nicely, still need kena kan from him. At least ur neighbors are old, tahan a few more years and begone ur troubles (not cursing them but nature is so, everyone passes away.)

Mine is a middle age professional, from his post, he could be earning $20k a month.
Now he is 50+, he could have earned at least $4M.
Previously had 2 cars n now got a new one.
Lucky I didn't vandalise or touch his family, as I am a law bidding citizen.
Only can hope Heaven have eyes to see how his family harassed our family with noise nuisance n disturbance and Let Karma take it place.

 

[cyke69sg]

NO use.
My family was harassed by a noisy family for 10 years.
They refused to go meet RC, TC or CMC.
We tried talk to them n put a post tik to asked them lower their noise.
Tried talking to them n in the end, they issue our family with PPO.
Cos he is rich n I am poor, accepted the Consented PPO.
Yet the noise didn't stop but become worse.
I am thinking of getting crowd funding to ask them go to court to reduce their noise that were affecting my family health.
Not that I don't want to move but my finance don't permit.

In MANY cases, NO use. Correct.

Dealing with people. Not friend. More like dealing with siao lang who sees you as their enemy.

Here's the thing. In SG, because you think the law is very strong can "force" people to do the "right thing" that kind of mentality so SGreans will keep harping on how they are "right" etc.

But the reality is that it is a battle of wills and resources. Like you said rich guy can hire lawyer do all kinds of pattern.

In the end the one with less resources will have to admit defeat and either put up with the harassment or move away. In crazy cases even move away still get harassed!

That's why in my first post to TS I said just move lah.

Wait till you go country where the law is something quite arguable not so black and white as SG. Like Canada. Seriously you don't want to have to deal with people on the wrong side of them. Too many problems and is absolutely NOT WORTH the time and headache.

Easier to deal with selling the property, pack up and move to a new place. Yes it is a big endeavor but at least you know there is progress and an end point goal.

With trying to "fight" the neighbor it goes round and round and round affects your mental health takes your time and goes NO WHERE. Don't bluff if you say doesn't affect your work and ability to make more money..

IS IT WORTH IT?

 

[Kanko San]

In MANY cases, NO use. Correct.

Dealing with people. Not friend. More like dealing with siao lang who sees you as their enemy.

Here's the thing. In SG, because you think the law is very strong can "force" people to do the "right thing" that kind of mentality so SGreans will keep harping on how they are "right" etc.

But the reality is that it is a battle of wills and resources. Like you said rich guy can hire lawyer do all kinds of pattern.

In the end the one with less resources will have to admit defeat and either put up with the harassment or move away. In crazy cases even move away still get harassed!

That's why in my first post to TS I said just move lah.

Wait till you go country where the law is something quite arguable not so black and white as SG. Like Canada. Seriously you don't want to have to deal with people on the wrong side of them. Too many problems and is absolutely NOT WORTH the time and headache.

Easier to deal with selling the property, pack up and move to a new place. Yes it is a big endeavor but at least you know there is progress and an end point goal.

With trying to "fight" the neighbor it goes round and round and round affects your mental health takes your time and goes NO WHERE. Don't bluff if you say doesn't affect your work and ability to make more money..

IS IT WORTH IT?

I agreed with you.
The rich will bully the poor or "see people".
Imagine if their neighbour family is those go in-and-out of jail type.
Do you think that family dare to bully ?
The one below gangster family will kill or harass back, which the most is go jail.
Only hope Karma is true, cos a man can be great, but he is not greater than GOD OR BUDDHA OR ALLAH.
I had seen pple gotten their Karma n I believed ( of course some will said coward thinking, let it be ).
Frankly speaking, I am up to my neck but my many friends told me, not worth it to use violence n think of the children sake.