Childless Marriage

[bigbadber]

It's a regression of the society nonetheless if enough people of the society are having one or more of the few reasons you have cited. A case in hand would be Singapore.

Our society is regressing because our Chinese couples are not having enough children due to the reasons you've cited.

In our case, yes, then I'll have to agree with u.

But no choice leh. Our circumstances and govt made it this way for us,

In the name of ever increasing GDP and maintaining our World Class status,

We have become too competitive and expensive for our own good.

IMO, it's irresponsible to bear kids when u cannot fairly provide for them.

Many couples can, so good for them. Some can't, so they have none or only one. Some can't but take the leap of faith and work towards their goal, at a risk.

But this 'regression' isn't worldwide. It only happens to a handful of countries like Sg, Japan etc... There are numbers in other countries to make up for the lack of babies in Sg.

So the solution is to import them in lor, whether it's good or bad for us.

Anyway, it's not like Singaporean's identity or our Chinese race is at risk of going extinct. Not like it matters to our govt anyway.

 

[bigbadber]

All I can comment is both me and my husband sacrificed alot for our child. Sometime i look back and miss the old life where I can travel with my friends, go out as when we wish to, travel without a worry at all.

But then again, whenever i look at him, there is just so much love and happiness. It is a fulfillment in life, never mind about the travelling and enjoyment. You can miss the YOLO days, but what you get out of having kids are fulfillment and happiness, which is priceless.

Good example of how couples should be.

Of cos there are pros and cons to having kids or none at all.

The key is to make a wise and informed decision by the couple as a whole unit.

Then proceed to be content with the consequences thereafter. Sometimes the sacrifices pulls them apart. Sometimes it makes the bond stronger.

Congrats to u both.

There's no right or wrong in either choice as long as you're doing no wrong to others.

Happiness in married life is most important.

 

[Leave No Men Behind]

Wah.. Dunno why you so misinformed...

Anyway, these days just take the pill or buy condoms la

Pill hearsay will cause hormones ruan

 

[leicash]

Agree.

If want to have child, make sure you can provide those basic care, teaching and time to guide them.
For what I see, many just give birth and throw to others to care.

How many people really take care of their child or children ?

i'm sorry but if i have children i won't want them to stay in a small and cramped house, eat hawker/instant food every day because i cant afford to give them better.

in short, i don't want to deprive them of anything like how i was not deprived of when i was young.

 

[bigbadber]

Pill hearsay will cause hormones ruan

Not true for my fren's case leh

She's been on the pill for years. Still a normal woman, physically and mentally.

And she's a hot hot milf btw, not that it matters

 

[opticloopy]

I think too many people in this world Busybody like to mend in other people business.

Single also their prob
Married no kids also their prob
Married got kids no boy also their prob

I think bottom line, don't live to please others.. It's too tiring to live up to social stigma

Only have kids if you want to have it. Don't live your life trying to meet others expectations and to appear normal

 

[cybercom8]

if you have kids and they turn out to be like some si ginnas in edwm, you won't commit suicide meh?

 

[Leave No Men Behind]

Not true for my fren's case leh

She's been on the pill for years. Still a normal woman, physically and mentally.

And she's a hot hot milf btw, not that it matters

Ok noted. I agree. This type of thing can mean can

 

[gkhchay]

I see all my child-free couple friends YOLO-ing. Spend money like water. Every weekend got eat omakase at atas Jap restaurants, every 3 mths go holiday. Sibei shiok.

Why oh why did I shoot raw....

I have 2 kids, daughter is already 25, son is 19. The joy of seeing your kids grow up is immeasurable, no money can buy. Now my wife & I have the means to travel whenever we like.

 

[Leave No Men Behind]

I have 2 kids, daughter is already 25, son is 19. The joy of seeing your kids grow up is immeasurable, no money can buy. Now my wife & I have the means to travel whenever we like.

Up lar. This is one good example. U ho mial liao. U been there. Cheers!!!

 

[cybercom8]

It's like saying if one were to be a Chinese, he must eat noodles. If he is Malay, he must like corners.

i read that and went wtf??!!

 

[shizuka_b]

I have 2 kids, daughter is already 25, son is 19. The joy of seeing your kids grow up is immeasurable, no money can buy. Now my wife & I have the means to travel whenever we like.

Mine 3 years and second one is 2mths. Long way to go. But i also hope they don't grow up too fast. I am aware how short childhood is.

 

[Ponpon830]

Mine 3 years and second one is 2mths. Long way to go. But i also hope they don't grow up too fast. I am aware how short childhood is.

3 yrs old is the cutest phase imo. Ya, I told my nephew to慢慢长大。。savor all the delights in life everyday.

 

[4Dluckystrike]

hehe... I've actually been living in Australia for the last 15 years.. me and my wife got together in Singapore right after A Levels.... I moved over after NS and my wife came 6 months later... It was always our intention to give our kids a stress-free start to life.... so its not a spur of the moment thing to leave Singapore.

Singapore is really not an ideal place for the sanity of children.

Kids here are always rushed to study n grow up.. To become a contributor to society but in the process lost of joy of growing up.

It's the same for many modern couples, they set up a home but the grind does not permit them to enjoy joys of familyhood ..

After Spending 10 plus hours at work or study per day , do your family still have energy ?

 

[Dark84]

My child hugged me to sleep last night. The feeling ? You got to experience yourself to understand

always go for at least 1 child. no matter whether the couple wants or don't want a child.

Pro is
1) Friday night and weekend is all yours to plan for fun
2) can sleep late late, no need to bother about child bedtime
3) can eat all the junk food, anytime, any place without worrying about setting bad example for the child
4) all your money is spent on yourself
5) got more time to hang out with your childless friends

Con is
1) people will ask u about it during CNY
2) people will say you two got problem behind your back
3) no sucker to take care of you, provided you know how to raise a child well
4) will be quite sad when people seem to have 'progressed' in life with raising their own family.
5) the other spouse will be absolutely lonely when your other half has passed on.
6) will not know the joy of your own child hugging you in your sleep

 

[Techno Pride]

There are many optimistic and nice sounding comments in this thread.

The 1.2(?) replacement birth rate paints a different picture.

http://limpehft.blogspot.sg/2015/10/on-issue-of-rising-childlessness-in.html?m=1

 

[gkhchay]

Kids here are always rushed to study n grow up.. To become a contributor to society but in the process lost of joy of growing up.

It's the same for many modern couples, they set up a home but the grind does not permit them to enjoy joys of familyhood ..

After Spending 10 plus hours at work or study per day , do your family still have energy ?

When it's your kids you'll have the energy believe me.

My wife & I didn't believe that being kiasu & kiasi would help our kids. We let them have a carefree & happy childhood as much as possible. As long as they did their best was good enough for us.

 

[Summer78]

Sounds like someone has a non functioning tool and is trying to comfort himself.

 

[Entry Level PC]

Martiage is not equal to having kids. Wat type of caveman thinking do ppl have? U mean no kids marriage is not happy, got kids marriage is happy? Then why ppl divorce even after having kids?

Caveman thinking?
Then no need to get married liao.

 

[Leave No Men Behind]