Childless Marriage

ralliart12

Supremacy Member
Joined
Jan 11, 2003
Messages
8,662
Reaction score
60
Many parents said before that couples who don't want kids give many reasons (don't want to bring them up in this stressful environment / don't like kids / no money / want to spend more time with themselves / quality of life / etc etc).. but these are all excuses. There is only one reason why perfectly capable couples choose not to have children - they lack the courage to do so. The thought of stress, only giving them the best if not don't give, don't know where to start becoming like parents, having to become "parents" instead of pigging their lives away.. all these are signs of a lack of courage. Scared of responsibility. Scared of change. Scared of bringing a child up into this frankly fearful world. Scared of transcending into REAL adulthood, parenting problems and all. One word - scared...

Not becoming parents automatically means the couple is pigging their lives away? Wow? "There is ONLY ONE reason"? I guess many other couples who are dedicated enough to commit their lives to other causes more meaningful to the couple themselves, e.g. participate in championing progressive causes, helping the needy, traveling all over the world, risking their lives to become reporters to capture the truth, or Doctors Without Borders ... I guess amongst these group of people, despite to contributions to humanity, as long as they do not borne children they are simply lacking in courage?

...
Respectfully, talk is easier said than done.. talk is free. Some children behave like idiots in public, parents really don't seem to be doing anything, then gossip will start.. "Why these parents so bo chup.. why they don't discipline.."

Talk is cheap. Hasn't it occured to some non-parents that they are probably way past the discipline stage and are into the "I'm too tired to care" phase.. they KNOW it's a nuisance.. but CAN they do anything about it, DO THEY HAVE THE ENERGY to do anything about it, and whether they know EVEN IF THEY DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT WILL THE KID LISTEN is an entirely different matter...

Respectfully, talk is INDEED easier said than done, it's FAR TOO EASY to just JUDGE the people who have made a personal choice not to bear children, than to respect the choice & free will of these couples & give them the benefit of the doubt that there may be sincere or even sound reasons that a couple may CHOOSE not to bring another life into this world?

I think bottom line just respect people w their decisions, and don't kpo trying to psycho people with your 101 reasons y they should have kids

I agree it's a personal choice. It's a personal choice & I believe it's NOT a socially-unacceptable behavior not to have children.

I dunno (like seriously, I really dunno) why it's more frequent that people who have kids start conversations lamenting people who chosed not to; than the other way round.

Having or not having children have their pros & cons. In fact, there are always 2 sides of the coin to many matters. Let the people who have made peace with their decisions, live with the consequences of those choices, be it detrimental or constructive to their lives.

This topic can easily be skewed either ways. I can easily say to those fellows who have kids & ARE strong-arming the people who don't to quickly go give birth, "oh you have kids 啊? Oh you deem that I also should have 啊? Then why you stop at 5 kids? Still healthy to procreate right? So young? You should have 15 kids lah? Why stop?".

But I don't go around IMPOSING MY IDEALS on other people. Because nurturing a future potential requires more sacrifice than I can ever imagine. I feel that responsible parents UNDERSTAND they will have to make such sacrifices for a good many years of their lives. So I don't insult their decisions. Likewise I also hope people don't insult mine.
 

zensushi

Moderator
Moderator
Joined
Feb 9, 2007
Messages
58,302
Reaction score
10,628
Children complete the family unit

It is amazing watching them grow up. A true blessing.
 

Leave No Men Behind

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
53,329
Reaction score
35
Minimal lar. If wan to lean towards such news report. Then stay single aloner 4eva. Hua heez jiu hoe. To frank, is ppl can feel how is it, but won't know wat is with children lor. Abc
 

AS Roma

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 30, 2015
Messages
643
Reaction score
0
Should people who dun love kids have children (dun like to play with other people's kids etc)? Or will automatically love kids once you have them?

Sent from Mars using GAGT

It's actually something you grow into.

Can I safely say that most current fathers do not "love children" as much as their wives before they had children?

It's just a role you grow into as you go along.......
 

blues7

High Supremacy Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2004
Messages
30,537
Reaction score
1,597
Once have kid

= no more you

Everything is kid

Somehow

Everything that used to be yours

Kid take priority

Some more

Nobody's will question

Everything kid do that's good = he is smart

Everything kid do that's bad = you fault, why you never reach properly

So think and rethink before you have kid

No turning back
 

zensushi

Moderator
Moderator
Joined
Feb 9, 2007
Messages
58,302
Reaction score
10,628
It's actually something you grow into.

Can I safely say that most current fathers do not "love children" as much as their wives before they had children?

It's just a role you grow into as you go along.......


Yes. I had little patience for kiddos, especially the brats.

Now more tolerant of children in general. Brats will be brats.
 

LaoUncle

Banned
Joined
Apr 26, 2012
Messages
781
Reaction score
11
I have never seen any couple childless by choice. If any couple tells you they choose to be childless, they are lying. It is either they don't know how to have sex or there is medical issues with their body. My fren told me he just don't want to have children. I told him don't talk cock lah.... Cannot say cannot. Don't say don't want.
 

Dr.KongHee

High Supremacy Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2012
Messages
35,865
Reaction score
3
eh... nowaday too much internet kill the youngster mindset. rast time maybe ish good days for kids. nowaday their mind are polluted by too much thing.
 

d515s23

Supremacy Member
Joined
Nov 19, 2011
Messages
8,899
Reaction score
386
Raise a child in sinkieland? Unless you're rich, please don't sabo the poor child.
 

fortunecat

Greater Supremacy Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2005
Messages
83,818
Reaction score
13,129
I have never seen any couple childless by choice. If any couple tells you they choose to be childless, they are lying. It is either they don't know how to have sex or there is medical issues with their body. My fren told me he just don't want to have children. I told him don't talk cock lah.... Cannot say cannot. Don't say don't want.
You have never seen? It's more like you dun believe them.

Sent from Mars using GAGT
 

Leave No Men Behind

Great Supremacy Member
Joined
Apr 7, 2015
Messages
53,329
Reaction score
35
Laouncle. Li arneh gong lang bo hoe lar. Whatever reason ppl do, si lang eh daiji. Be tactful. I got ppl around also as u stated. But, ppl no say topic I also dun wan probe..sensitive
 
Important Forum Advisory Note
This forum is moderated by volunteer moderators who will react only to members' feedback on posts. Moderators are not employees or representatives of HWZ Forums. Forum members and moderators are responsible for their own posts. Please refer to our Community Guidelines and Standards and Terms and Conditions for more information.
Top